What Did You Expect?
by musiclover67
Summary: Sequel to "Completely Unexpected"  READ THAT FIRST . I had so many dreams for the future when I married Murphy, but I never expected it would come to this. MurphyXOC ConnorXOC
1. Chapter 1

**Chapter 1**

"There is no new information on the victim found slain this morning inside the church of the Holy Saints."

"Hey Bri!" Hailey called from the kitchen, "Come look at this!"

I went into the kitchen of our small apartment, picking clothes off the floor as I went.

"What?" I asked her, throwing the clothes in a laundry basket and moving to pour myself a cup of coffee.

"Here," she pointed the remote at the TV sitting on the kitchen counter, turning up the volume, "Just listen to this."

"-have confirmed that the body was ritualized with pennies in the eyes. Many remember this as the calling card of the vigilante killers known as the Saints, who went on a murder spree here in Boston-"

My jaw dropped and I turned to Hailey, about to say something. She shh'd me, pointing back at the TV before I could say anything else.

"-that ended eight years ago when the Saints walked into open court, and executed mafia don Papa Joe Yakavetta before a courtroom of terrified witnesses-"

"Whatever!" I exclaimed, "They make it sound like Yakavetta was some innocent guy! He was fucking _killing_ people for God's sake!"

"Just listen!" Hailey turned up the TV even louder.

"-the ominous question hangs heavy in the air. Are they back?"

Hailey and I just looked at each other. Both of us were thinking the same thing; it wasn't them….was it?

"Who was killed?" I asked.

"The priest," Hailey replied.

"Then it couldn't have been-" I reasoned, "I mean they would've- I'm sure someone would've at least _called_ us or-"

"I just talked to Connor yesterday," Hailey cut off my rambling, shaking her head, "It wasn't them. Plus, think about it. The priest? They're so religious…."

"Yeah, definitely not them," I agreed, getting the creamer out of the fridge.

"Mommy!"

I smiled, turning around to a small three year old boy running through the living room into the kitchen.

"Mommy I'm awake!" he exclaimed, coming to a stop right in front of me and flashing me a grin.

"I see that," I replied with a laugh, getting out a spoon and stirring my coffee.

He laughed, then ran to attack Hailey. Hailey laughed, trying to shove him off while I watched, leaning against the counter. He looked so much like…._him_, that sometimes he was hard to look at. Brown messy hair, pale skin, small eyes, button nose….the only thing he had inherited from me was the brown eyes; the rest was all Murphy.

Murphy.

Just his name had my body reacting; the heart pumping, the hands shaking, the stomach twisting. It had been three months since we had talked last….three long, hard months. I bit my lip, trying to keep myself from crying _again_. I refused to start my day off like this; in tears and full of nothing but sad memories of the love of my life.

"Ok, I've gotta go," Hailey announced, standing up and bringing her bowl to the sink. "The new waitress starts at eight, and I want to be there before the others start training her."

"Ok, have fun," I replied, giving her a half-hearted smile. "I'll see you tonight."

She nodded at me with a grin, not noticing my emotional state- I figured she was just used to it by now. She grabbed her jacket, said goodbye to Dylan, ruffling his hair, and headed out the door.

"Where's she going?" Dylan asked, just like he did every morning after Hailey left.

"Work silly," I answered with a grin, picking him up and putting him at a chair at the table.

"Where's that?" he asked curiously, already scrambling to stand up on the chair and reach for the salt and pepper shakers.

"Her restaurant," I answered with a sigh, moving the shakers on the counter and out of his reach. "What do you want to eat?"

We went through the daily morning routine. I fed him, quickly gulped down my coffee and a bowl of cereal while he watched TV. Then I got him dressed, got myself dressed, and we headed out the door. I dropped him off at daycare, and _finally_ I had some quiet time. I sat in the car for a moment in the daycare parking lot, closing my eyes and leaning my head back.

_"How can you even say that?" I yelled into the phone, pacing back and forth, "Are you even _listening_ to what you're saying right now?"_

_ "I'm listenin' Bri!" Murphy yelled back , "I' makes perfect fuckin' sense!"_

_ "Not talking to your child makes perfect fucking sense?" I growled angrily, "What the fuck, Murph'? This isn't like you…we've been married for how long now?" _

_ "Five years," Murphy answered softly. _

_ "Yeah," I spat, "Yeah, five fucking years. And you're going to just leave it like this?" _

_ "I'm no' leavin' ya Bri, I jus'-" he cut-off and I could hear him taking a huge breath, "Look, I'm gonna go." _

_ "Murphy don't go," I said softly, my tone going from angry to desperate, "Just talk to me. We need to talk about this-"_

_ "No, I don' wanna-" he stopped again, "I love ya Bri. I'll tal' to ya later." _

_ "Murphy, God dammit!" I yelled, tears filling my eyes, "You can't just hang up! We can-"_

_ I stopped, listening to the dial tone on the other end. I angrily threw the phone on the ground, cursing at it. I stumbled to the nearest chair and collapsed into it, a sob escaping my throat before I finally let the tears fall from my eyes._

I shook my head angrily, pinching the bridge of my nose. How long had I been sitting here? I caught a parent walking toward their car, watching me uneasily. I looked at the ceiling, waiting for the few tears to fall to the back of my eyes. Then I shifted the car into reverse, backing out and heading to work.

**~BDS~**

I rolled my shoulders back, exhaling heavily.

I was going to win; I always did. The cheers surrounding me were deafening, all the drunken, smelly men yelling and encouraging the violence. Normally, I would be in that crowd, putting what little money I had on the fighter I thought was going to win.

Fuck that. Tonight I _was_ the fighter.

I looked around the ship, observing my audience. I watched a drunken man, holding a cup of beer that was slopping out of the cup as he stumbled around. I watched another pull money out of his pocket, eyeing me with interest. I stopped at Connor, who was watching me with his arms crossed, looking worried. I rolled my eyes; he was always so fucking worried about me all the time.

My opponent was cracking his knuckles. He turned to growl at me and I smirked: this guy honestly thought he could beat me. Sure, technically he was three times my size with bulging muscles and nothing but protein shakes and lifting weights in his daily plan. Didn't mean I couldn't beat his ass.

The bell rang, echoing of the walls of the ring, which was actually just a huge storage room in the basement of the ship. We immediately began side-stepping in unison, making a circle. We were at least six feet away from each other, his eyes never leaving mine.

I could feel the adrenaline, the mad power pumping through my veins. The feeling was intoxicating: it made me feel invincible, as if nothing could stop me. He finally threw a punch and I dodged it easily, grabbing him by the forearm. He yelled angrily and I twisted his arm around, flinging him in a half circle before he hit the ground with a thud.

He grabbed my leg and pulled, sending me straight to the floor. I lifted up slowly, trying to get myself together.

_Murphy just talk to him. He's your kid…_

The man punched me straight in the face, and my head snapped back forcefully.

_What kind of father leaves their kid like that? He's never going to know he has a dad, Murphy! _

Another punch to my gut sent me doubling over in pain, spitting blood out of my mouth.

_I named him Dylan. Dylan Liam. It means great protector. You know, just like you are to me…_

Bri's voice was echoing in my brain, filling me with thoughts I tried to avoid. I needed to hit, I needed to punch, I needed to get her out of my head.

I lifted myself up off the ground, throwing the hardest punch I could conjure at his face. He grunted, his face turning to the left and his body falling with it. I jumped on his stomach, straddling him and spitting on his face. He growled, but before he could even lift his arm, I was punching him back and forth on the face. Right hook, left hook, smack, smack. I kept hitting him, long after his eyes had closed and he was unconscious. His face was a mess, with blood everywhere and swelling wounds. It was all because of me, and I was getting some sick satisfaction out of it.

"Murphy!" Connor yelled, while I continued to punch the man, "Murph', the fights over!"

"I don' care, Connor!" I yelled, even as he wrapped his arms around my waist and yanked me up, "Didya see wha' tha' motherfucker did ta me? He deserves ta fuckin' die!"

A part of me knew I was being unreasonable, but the bigger part of me couldn't have cared less. I was trying to get out of Connor's arms, intent on beating that guy to a pulp.

"Calm the fuck down!" Connor yelled in my ear, pulling me away from the unconscious man and through the swarms of people, "God Murphy, ge' a fuckin' hold o' yerself!"

I started to calm down, and stopped struggling in Connor's arms. He let me go, and I walked away from him, breathing heavily. I finally looked up at him, and he was watching me, confusion and worry written all over his face. I looked away, ignoring it. I didn't care, it was all worth it.

She was finally out of my head.


	2. Chapter 2

**Author's Note: **So I just wanted to start off by saying, I'm glad everyone likes this story so far :D! We got seven reviews in 2 days! Woohoo! Also, I'm not alone on this story! I'm working with the most amazing, awesome, smart, cool editor ever (aka NothingisTrue)! She's helping me with the idea, editing, random-lines-that-are-way-better-than-I-could-think-of process :)! So, I'm not taking all the credit for this, even though it says it's only by me. It's not, and I couldn't have/can't write this without here.

Ok my random blurb is done, happy reading :)!

**Chapter 2**

"Murph', wha's goin' on wit' ya?" Connor asked me.

I sighed heavily, not in the mood to have this conversation. He _knew_ what was up, so why did he need to ask?

"Don' worry abou' i', Connor," I replied, continuing to prick his skin with the small needle in my hand.

There was a moment of silence, and I knew he was trying to think of a different way of asking me. He wasn't going to let it go….he wouldn't be Connor if he did.

"Come o' Murphy," he said softly, turning around on his chair to look at me, "Ya tell me everythin'."

I just rolled my eyes, taking him by the shoulders and turning him back around. I heard him growl under his breath at my defiance, but he didn't say anything else for a minute. I was trying to get this tattoo on his back finished so I could have some alone time. Connor had already finished mine, making sure to pester me the whole time about what happened earlier tonight. It was getting on my fucking nerves.

"Is i' Bri?" he asked, breaking the tense silence that had fallen between us.

I froze, my eyes closing at her name. Why? _Why_ did he have to bring her up?

"Er may'e Dylan?" Connor added, pouring salt on my open wounds. "Is i' 'cause yer no' talkin' to 'em? Or-"

"Connor," I snapped, inhaling deeply at the twisting pain in my chest. "please, jus'…I don' wanna talk abou' i' alrigh'?"

He nodded, knowing he had gone too far. I let out the breath I hadn't known I was holding, continuing to prick at his skin. I was almost done; there were just a few little spots I needed to clean up.

I could practically hear his thoughts: why won't he talk to me? What's wrong with him? Why won't he confront his feelings? I shook my head; I needed to distract him.

"Di' ya see the way tha' Mexican was lookin' a' us?"

"Ya, he knew 'ho we were righ' away," Connor replied, sounding uneasy.

"How woul' he even recognize us?" I asked thoughtfully, trying to keep Connor's mind from veering back to me.

"Ya don' remember the fuckin' sketches on the newschannel?" he asked.

"Oh shi' tha's righ'," I remembered.

"Fuck's sake…"

I rolled my eyes at Connor; he thought he knew everything.

"Ya know, every time ya see those composites on TV, an' they catch the guy, it looks nothing li'e him. Bu' ours..."

"Jus' our luck, righ'? We draw Leonardo fuckin' da Vinci as a sketch artis'."

I laughed darkly at that; my luck was waning thin nowadays.

"An' two days ago we looked like Jesus Chris'. Wha' the fuck we cu' our hair for?" I asked thoughtfully, pausing my work on his tattoo.

"Yeah, tha's righ'. I don' know, i' jus' seemed li'e the t'ing ta do a' the time, though, didn' i'?" he replied matter-of-factly.

"Maybe we shoul' dye i'," I suggested.

"Wha'?"

"Well, they're always dyin' their hair in the movies, li'e _The Fugitive_. I's covert and shit," I defended myself, hearing the condescension in Connor's voice.

"Wha' color would ya dye i'?" he asked with a slightly mocking tone.

"Lighter," I hesitated, "I guess."

"Do ya mean _blonde_?" he asked, beginning to laugh.

"I didn' fuckin' say tha'," I said, pointing the needle at him.

"Li'e California surfer boy-"

"Tha's not wha' I'm fuckin' saying!" I exclaimed, starting to get angry.

"Li'e gay, gay, gay, faggo'y blonde?" he continued gleefully, laughing hysterically.

"I'm fuckin' warnin' you!" I yelled.

"Stay gold, Ponyboy! Stay gold!" he raised his voice over me.

"Fuck you!" I stabbed him in the back with the needle, trying to get him to shut up.

"Ah, you fuckin' cunt! Jesus fucking Christ!" Connor yelled angrily, knocking over the jar of pennies sitting next to him.

They crashed to the floor, and Connor turned around, watching them fall and roll under the wall. He just stared at me with a look of disbelief.

"Well, I was fuckin' mad!" I retorted, though, I sounded more like I was apologizing than defending myself.

"Wha' kind o' fuckin' crazy..." Connor trailed off.

He and I started swinging at each other, but nothing seemed to connect. For a second, it was almost how we used to fight way back before this Saint's business began; the kind of fighting that let each other know that all was forgiven, no matter what crazy shit we pulled. I was snapped back to reality real quick as Romeo stepped around the corner. Connor was rooted to the spot, socked by Romeo's sudden appearance. I took a step back, my fist still held near my chest, boxer-style, ready for anything

"I know who you are," Romeo gasped, his eyes widening, "You guys are-"

"Shut i'!" Connor cut him off, angrily looking around to see if anyone had heard.

"Whoa! This is so fucking cool, man!" Romeo exclaimed happily.

"I'm from Boston, and I love you guys, shit, everybody loves you guys. Maybe I can get in on this thing. You know, bring some _raza_ into this. Hey! Is it true that you guys say a prayer before you grease somebody?" Romeo continued to ramble on while Connor and I exchanged looks.

We grinned at each other before simultaneously throwing Romeo down, pointing our guns at his head.

"An' an awesome wailin' was heard throughou' heaven!" Connor began a fake prayer while I tried to keep a straight face.

Romeo tried to scream, but I quickly covered his mouth before continuing the prayer.

"An' the terrible han' of the Lord struck upon the Earth!"

"An' as almigh'y God created you!" Connor went on, his voice getting progressively louder. "Now... HE CALLETH YOU HOOOME!"

Connor pressed the trigger, but there was nothing but the loud, metallic click of the hammer.

"Oops, busy signal. We'll ha'e ta calleth back," Connor and I burst into hysterics, getting off of him.

"Le's have a sho' while we're waitin'!" I yelled joyously while Romeo got up and Connor continued laughing.

I picked up a bottle I had spotted earlier on the ground; Romeo must have dropped it when he came in. I let the alcohol roll down my throat, savoring the pure happiness I was feeling at that moment.

I knew it wouldn't last long.

**~BDS~**

"If I have to listen to him talk one more time about his motorcycle, I think I might pull all my hair out!"

I nodded, smiling at my last patient of the day while I subtly looked at my watch. Fifteen more minutes.

"Then I told him, I said 'Frank, if you like your motorcycle that much, why don't you marry _it_ instead!'"

I nodded again, acting as if I was taking notes while I was really just mindlessly doodling. I stopped, glancing down to see what I had been drawing. I tried to keep from blushing as I saw the name 'Murphy' scrawled across the page in an almost calligraphic style. I resisted the urge to crumble it up in a ball, instead just turning to the next page of my notebook quickly. I thought it was pretty ironic that I was a certified relationship therapist; all of myrelationships work out _so _well.

"He drives me absolutely crazy!" she exclaimed, clenching her hands over her purple-beaded bag. "Thirty eight years of this nonsense!"

"Mrs. Jamison," I said, trying to keep my tone friendly and reasonable, "I think you need to step back and look at the big picture, here. I'm sure your husband still loves you, even more than he loves that motorcycle. He's probably just too wrapped up in it right now to realize how he's making you feel; men tend to do that."

I cringed internally; was it just me or did that have a freakish reference to my own husband?

"I suppose you're right," she sighed, visibly relaxing, "It's just hard! He's so irritating, you have no idea."

"You're responding negatively to him, too," I added, "Try taking a deep breath when he upsets you, then calmly tell him how he makes you feel. As long as he's not by the motorcycle and you have his full attention, he will hear you out."

"Ok," she nodded, "thank you so much Dr. MacManus."

That name got me every time; I had his last name for God's sake! And still, he refused to talk to me!

"That's what I'm here for," I forced a grin as we shook hands, "You have a good rest of your day."

She thanked me and walked out the door. I sighed, collapsing into my computer chair for a moment. My work was finally over, but really, my day had just begun.

I made it to Dylan's daycare, the sun almost completely set. I walked in, and the daycare significantly quieter than it was when I had been there that morning. Most of the kids were gone by now. I felt bad leaving him here for such long hours, but I didn't have much of a choice.

"Mommy!" Dylan squealed, running full-speed into the lobby.

"Hi buddy!" I exclaimed, laughing as he wrapped his arms tightly around my legs.

His teacher came around the corner two seconds later, smiling sweetly at us.

"How was he today?" I asked, mentally preparing myself for anything.

"Well," she sighed, looking at Dylan before looking at me again, "he didn't have such a great day."

"Were you difficult today?" I asked, picking him up and sticking him on my hip.

"No," he replied innocently, his eyes widening in defense.

I chuckled softly, shaking my head as I turned back to look at her, motioning for her to go on.

"He was a good participator," she continued, smiling at him, "but as far as listening….not so good. He was really rambunctious today. He was jumping around a lot, and I was having a lot of trouble getting him to sit still during quiet time."

I sighed. Could he be any more like his father?

"Ok," I replied, nodding my head, "I'm sorry about that. We're working on it."

"Don't worry about it," she dismissed, waving my apology away, "He's a good kid, don't trouble yourself, Mrs. MacManus."

Ugh, there was that damn name again.

"Well thank you," I smiled at her, reaching in the basket by the front door to get his diaper bag, "I'll see you tomorrow morning."

We exchanged goodbyes, and I headed out the door. The whole ride home Dylan talked my ear off, telling me about the different things he had learned about that day. Apparently they had learned about dinosaurs, because he was full of facts about them.

"They're estincts!" he exclaimed excitedly as we climbed the steps to our apartment.

"_Extinct_," I corrected gently, digging around in my purse for the key, "and, yes, they are!"

"I love them, mommy!" he babbled on happily as I pushed the door open, "I love them!"

I laughed, sighing at the delicious smell wafting from the kitchen.

"What do you love, Dylan?" Hailey asked, coming from the kitchen with spoon in her hand.

"Dinosaurs!" he exclaimed happily.

She laughed, and ruffled his hair before he ran into the living room. I came into the kitchen, falling into a chair at the table and groaning.

"Long day?" Hailey asked, raising an eyebrow at me from the stove.

"You have no idea," I complained, rubbing a hand down my face.

"Go take a bubble bath," Hailey said, holding up a hand when I opened my mouth to protest, "Go on. I can take care of Dylan for the night. You need to relax."

"Thanks," I sighed, giving her a grateful smile, "I'll make it up to you."

She waved me away with a grin, turning back to the bowl at the stove.

I filled the bathtub with hot water, and gratefully sank into the warmth. I was completely submerged in bubbles, and I closed my eyes, sighing as I leaned my head back.

_"Murphy, you shouldn't be in here," I grinned, watching him walk into the bathroom. _

_"Wha'?" he asked innocently, "I jus' wanted some soap 's all." _

_"Uh huh," I replied, raising my eyebrows as he closed and locked the door. _

_He smiled, walking towards the tub, where I was completely under bubble-covered water with only my head sticking out. I smiled back at him, and he kneeled down, kissing me gently. _

_"Hi," he whispered, our noses touching. _

_"Hi," I whispered back, grinning. _

_He ran his fingers through my hair, bringing me closer for a passionate kiss. We picked up a rhythm and I ran my fingers through his hair. _

_"Oh look," I said in mock surprise, "your hair's all wet. Guess you'll have to get in with me now." _

_"I guess so," he grinned, winking at me. _

_He stripped down and I watched him, still amazed at the fact that he was _mine. _He caught me watching and I blushed, but he just laughed before crawling in with me. He pulled me to him as soon as he was settled, and moaned softly at the close contact. _

_"You need to visit me more often," I murmured into his chest, "Being denied this long is killing me." _

_"I wish I could," he replied, running a hand down my back._

_He brought me up for another kiss and I deepened it almost immediately; no way was I going to waste this time we had. _

_He groaned as I pressed my body against his. He grabbed my hips and pulled them down on his, creating a delicious friction. _

_"You are gonna be the death o' me," he moaned softly in my ear, taking it in his mouth to nibble on it._

_I sighed, moving my head to give him better access. He moved down my neck, sucking on it to leave his mark. _

_"Murphy, God," I was unable to keep from slipping from my mouth. _

_I was grinding against him now, unable to control my body. Had the water gotten ten times hotter than it was before? _

_His hands ran up and down my back. I ran my hands up his arms and gripped his shoulders. The hard, smooth skin felt wonderful against my skin, and I grinned at him before trailing my fingers down his chest. I took my sweet time, letting my hands slowly wander down his stomach, then past his belly button. His breath hitched, and I raised my eyebrows at him. _

_"What?" I asked innocently. _

_"Qui' teasin' Bri," he breathed, his eyes closed and his head thrown back. _

_I just laughed, running my hands back up again. It was worth the wait just to see Murphy begging under my arms like that. _

_He ran his hands up my legs and to the inside of my thighs. I whined involuntarily, trying to move closer to his hands. He laughed wickedly, moving away from the spot I wanted him to touch the most. _

_"Murphy…" I begged._

_I let my fingers trail down his body again, this time not stopping at his belly button. I let them roam farther, gently-_

"Mommy, I nee' to say nigh' nigh'!" Dylan exclaimed from outside the bathroom door, "Can I come in?"

I sighed shakily, rubbing my eyes and sitting up. I gathered my senses, before calling back to him.

"You can come in!"

He burst through the door, a big smile on his face and Buzz Lightyear pajamas on. He got on his tip toes, gripping the edge of the tub to lift himself up. I leaned in for him to kiss my cheek, and he did before giggling in my ear.

"Nigh' mommy," he said sweetly, smiling at me.

"Nigh' baby," I answered, softly cupping his chubby cheek.

He grinned before running off; that was obviously too much love for a kid of his boyish personality.

Fifteen minutes later, I climbed out of the bath, figuring it was time to get out. I dried off, changed into sweats, and went into the living room.

Hailey was sitting on the couch, the TV blaring some sitcom. I sat down next to her, glancing at her face. Her eyes were on the TV, but they were glazed over. She was snapping her phone opened and closed, a nervous habit of hers.

"Did Connor call yet?" I asked gently.

She shook her head no, still staring off into space. I was just about to ask her if she wanted to talk about it, when there was a knock on the door.

Hailey snapped out of it, her eyebrows furrowed as she turned to look at me.

"Are you expecting anyone?" she asked.

I shook my head, looking just as confused. She cocked her head to the side, still looking confused as she got up from the couch. She went to the front door, hesitantly opening it. Hailey let out an excited gasp.

"What?" I asked, sitting up higher on the couch to get a better look.

Hailey ignored me. I could see the back of her head, which was in the way of showing me who was at the front door. I craned my neck, on my knees on the couch now. Who was it?

I suddenly froze at the name that came softly from Hailey's lips.

"Connor…."


	3. Chapter 3

**Chapter 3**

Connor. That one word, just that single name spoken softy through Hailey's lips left me breathless. I felt my mind and my heart racing, both threatening to overwhelm me. Was he here, too?

My heart soared at the possibility, but my mind wouldn't let it fly, wouldn't let allow myself to feel complete and utter joy at the thought of seeing him again. What would I say to him? How could I possibly forgive him for leaving me all alone? For leaving his son fatherless? How could we ever go back to the way it was, when I knew it might never be the same?

Logic screamed at me to never forgive him, but my emotions wouldn't let me do that. Despite everything that has happened, my heart would always belong to Murphy. I was still hopelessly in love with him. I tried so hard to tell myself that he was gone, to forget about him and move forward, but I could not erase the love I felt for him, even after all this time. No matter how much time passed, a large part of me would never stop hoping that maybe, he would come back to me, come back to the life and the love he had left behind.

"Connor's here!"

I jumped, startled as I was torn from my thoughts and called back to reality by Hailey's jubilant voice. I stood up quickly, rushing to the door. I couldn't get there fast enough, too impatient to see if Murphy had come as well. I barely acknowledged Connor, giving him a slight smile before I stood on my toes, struggling to make myself taller in order to search behind him. If I could just see his face again, just see him smiling at me, maybe everything could just go back to normal, everything forgiven…

"He's no' 'ere, Bri," Connor said apologetically, breaking me from my thoughts.

"What?" I asked incredulously. "Where the fuck is he?"

"Uh…" he rubbed the back of his neck, looking awkwardly away from me. "I….I don' really know."

"Bullshit," I snapped, craning my neck hopefully to see if Connor was just messing with me. I was so sure he would be there, so desperately hoping he would.

"Bri," Hailey watched me with an almost pitiful look, "come on, he's not here."

I looked at her, quickly turning away when I saw the look on her face. I looked pathetic. I shook my head, taking a deep breath.

"Right," I nodded, unable to look at either of them. "Right, sorry."

I could feel their stares as I turned my back on them, feeling my eyes begin to warm as they welled up with fresh tears

I walked to the living room, and I could hear them quietly following behind me. I sat on the edge of the couch, curling myself into a ball and acting as if I was watching TV. I could still feel them eyeing me nervously, as if I was some kind of freak show. I defiantly refused to look back, instead keeping my eyes glued to the television.

Soon they gave up, instead just sneaking glances at me while they talked amongst themselves. I didn't want to listen to it; I didn't want to listen them laugh and kiss and hold each other in their arms, while I had nothing but the arm of the sofa to comfort me. I pushed back yet another round of tears as I heard Hailey giggle. I just wanted her to shut up.

"So 'ow was yer day, Bri?" Connor asked, obviously just trying to get me out of my bad mood.

"Fine," I answered shortly, still not looking at either of them.

"You wanna watch a movie or something?" Hailey asked, her voice sweeter than usual.

I shrugged, still staring at the ridiculous sitcom on television.

I heard her sigh, and the room was silent for an awkward moment.

They nearly gave up after that, Connor would try to ask me something every once and a while, but I refused to answer him with anything more than a few syllables long. Hailey shot me dirty looks every time this happened, but I just rolled my eyes, which I'm sure pissed her off even more. I didn't care; I wasn't in the mood for their pity-party crap. I was perfectly capable of throwing one of those all by myself, thank you very much.

"I shou' probably go," Connor announced after what seemed like days, "'ve been 'ere fer a long time…"

"What, do you have a curfew or something?" Hailey asked, not wanting him to leave. Hadn't she spent enough time with him already?

"Nah, I jus' nee' ta ge' back ta-" he stopped, glancing at me, then quickly back to Hailey "-I shou' jus' be getting' home."

Hailey nodded, walking him to the door. My body was feeling pretty stiff; I had been sitting in the same position for four hours. I stretched as Hailey entered the room.

"Oh, look who decided to come out of their fetal position," Hailey commented, shaking her head at me. "Seriously Bri, what the fuck is your problem?"

I couldn't stand it when people yelled at me; I mean I physically couldn't stand it. It was some weird deformity of mine. It scares me, and this time was no different. I could feel that jolt in my stomach as my hands started to shake. I just looked back at her, not really sure what to say.

"We were trying to be nice to you!" she went on, her voice rising. "We kept trying to talk to you and you completely blew us off! You don't have to be so fucking rude just because you're precious boyfriend didn't show up!"

I flew to my feet, my veins coursing with boiling, hot anger. I was all rage, all fury, my fear altogether forgotten with that callous jibe.

"Are you fucking kidding me?" I yelled, glaring angrily at her. "What the fuck, Hailey? You _know_ what my situation is! You know he hasn't talked to me in months and what he's done to me! Why the fuck wouldn't I be upset when he didn't show up?"

"I didn't say you couldn't be upset!" she exclaimed. "You just don't have to take it out on everyone else! Not talking to _us_ is not going to fix your problem here, Bri!"

"You don't get it!" I screamed, tears springing to my eyes once more. "You don't know what it's like! You're too fucking wrapped up in Connor and his feelings to recognize mine."

"Like what, Bri?" she spat. "What am I supposed to be recognizing?"

"I'm depressed!" I yelled at the top of my lungs, and I could feel my face turning bright red. "My husband of eight years has stopped talking to me for three months! He's never seen our child! I can't get him to come anywhere near me anymore because he's so afraid of what will happen!"

"That's not my fault!" Hailey yelled. "I get that you're upset, but you can't take it out on Connor and me! It's not _our_ fault Murphy's a deadbeat dad!"

I froze, just staring at her.

The second she said it, I knew she had gone too far. She swallowed, her angry face now falling into a guilty one, some of the red in her cheeks dying down. I felt the tears spill over, cascading down my cheeks as I continued to stare at my best friend. Her face now looked completely guilty, and she looked as if she was having an internal battle with herself.

I turned around, feeling the sobs building up in my throat.

"Bri…" I heard Hailey mumble, sounding almost embarrassed.

"Just leave me alone," I snapped, moving down the hallway to my room.

I slammed the door closed, then collapsed on the bed. My composure had broken, finally letting the sobs rush out.

**~BDS~**

"Doc, come on…" I muttered to myself, resting the phone on my shoulder as I bit my thumbnail.

"H-H-Hello," he answered, and I could hear the pub in full swing in the background.

"Doc!" I exclaimed happily. "Hey, i's Murphy!"

"Murphy!" he said happily. "How've ya b-b-been?"

"Soun' as an Irish Poun', Doc!" I answered quickly. "Hey listen, ya think ya coul' hel' me ou'?"

"Wha' do ya, fuck! ass!, need?" he asked.

"There's a man, he's go' je' black hair an' a big scruffy beard, he's been stealin' shit. Ya know 'ho he is? 'E's a real greasy lookin' piece o' shit and looks like 'e's in 'is mi'-for'ies."

"Yeah, Yeah!" Doc said excitedly. "Real c-c-c-creepy lookin' guy, he comes in here all the time about one in the m-m-m-morning."

"Tha's wha' I though'," I nodded, smiling to myself. "Yer the only pub in town tha's open all nigh'."

"Is that a-a-all ya needed?" he asked, and I heard the sound of breaking glass in the background.

"Ya tha's i'," I replied, "T'anks, Doc."

"N-N-N-No problem."

I hung up the phone hurriedly. I put on my black long sleeved shirt, grabbing my black beanie and pulling it onto my head. I was going to teach that guy a lesson, whether Connor liked it or not.

_"I think we shoul' jus' stay a' Doc's this time," I suggested, taking a small sip of my warm beer. "'e offered i' ta us las' time."_

_ "Yer probably righ'," Connor agreed, looking around at the surrounding tables. "I' will keep us more hidden too."_

_ I nodded, savoring the sunshine. We wouldn't get to see very much of this once we started hunting down this imitator we were after. I cautiously surveyed the small café we had chosen, a small place in the middle of South Boston. This area is mostly an Irish neighborhood, so hopefully nobody would bother us here, but, just in case, we made sure to keep our faces subtly turned down, careful not to look suspicious, but rather like we just wanted to keep to ourselves._

_ There was a sudden scream, and Connor turned around, looking for the source of the noise. There was a woman, pointing at a man running down the sidewalk._

_ "My purse!" she screeched. "He's stolen my purse!" _

_ We watched the man, getting a good look at him, and I made sure to memorize his features. Jet black hair, full beard, average height, super skinny. He was running fast, and before I could observe his eye color he was gone. _

_ "Motherfucker," I said under my breath, getting up quickly. _

_ "Murphy!" Connor hissed, pushing me in the stomach to knock me in my chair. _

_ "I'm no' gonna le' him ge' away with that!" I snapped at him, attempting to stand up again. _

_ "Murph', calm down," he reached over the table, pushing my shoulder back down. "I don' wan' us drawin' attention ta ourselves."_

_ "'ho cares?" I asked angrily. "'e needs ta be taugh' a lesson."_

_ Connor just shook his head._

_ "Loo', if yer no' gonna lemme do i' now, we'll do i' later tonigh'," I consented. "We nee' some fuckin' practice! How long has i' been? Eigh' years?"_

_ "There's no nee' fer tha', Murphy," Connor sighed, "Yer bein' ridiculous. Besides, 'm goin' ta see Hailey an' Bri tonigh'….ya shoul' come."_

_ "I can'," I answered quickly, ignoring the twist in my stomach at Bri's name. _

_ "Murphy, come o'," Connor pressed, looking at me with concern. "Ya can' hide from 'er ferever."_

_ "'m no' _hidin'_ from 'er," I mumbled. _

_ "Ya nee' ta talk to 'er!" he insisted, getting frustrated, "an' ya need ta see Dylan-"_

_ "Connor, knock i' off!" I exclaimed, earning a few nervous glances from the people around us. "I'll see them when I see them, alrigh'?"_

_ Connor sighed, shaking his head again and taking a drink of his soda. _

_ "Fine, do wha' e'er ya wan'," Connor said, "jus' don' do anythin' stupid, go' it?"_

I rolled my eyes, checking my pocket one last time for my gun. Connor was so dramatic; it's not like I was planning on killing the guy.

I just wanted to teach him a lesson.

**~BDS~**

I was so sick of crying.

I let another sob escape my throat, more tears sliding down my cheeks and into my mouth. With the tears came my thoughts; my depressing, heart-wrenching, and completely true thoughts.

Everything Hailey said was true.

Murphy wasn't talking to me, he was being a terrible dad, and now I'm taking it out on everyone else. He wasn't even _being_ a dad! He was out doing god-knows-what, refusing to see or talk to me or his son! Now he was _here_, right here in Boston, and still nothing had changed. The thought of him being that close and still not coming to see me was painful.

Another gasp, another whimper, and another stream of tears. My chest was literally aching as I tried to just bury everything. Put it all in a small little box, tape it up, and light it on fire.

"Bri?" Hailey called softly into my room. "Bri, I'm sorry, ok?"

I didn't answer at first, trying to calm myself down. I had never intended for Hailey to actually hear my breakdown.

"Bri, come on," Hailey begged. "Bri, come on, can we just talk about this? I'm sorry!"

I sighed, getting up and going to the door. I opened it, seeing a tearful Hailey on the other side. We locked eyes for a moment, and then I pulled her in for a hug. I felt her arms tighten around me as she sniffled in my ear.

"I'm sorry, I shouldn't have said that," she mumbled, pulling back to look at me.

"It's ok, it's fucking true," I answered shakily, trying to wipe away the rest of my tears.

"Something's going on with him," Hailey nodded. "I don't know what it is."

I just shook my head. I didn't know either; all I knew was it was killing me.

"Come on," Hailey smiled at me before taking my arm, "let me make you a drink."

I laughed, letting her drag me into the kitchen.

**~BDS~**

_Murphy, you can't do this to me. Please….don't do this to me!_

I punched him square in the jaw, his beard scratching my hands. I was breathing heavily, straddling the man as I swung over and over at anything I could reach.

_He's three years old now, and he still doesn't know who his father is! Are you proud of that? _

I watched the blood trickle out of his nose, going into his open mouth as he gasped for air.

_I love you Murphy…I love you more than anything in this world. You know that, right? _

I could feel the pain in my chest, the knot in my stomach, the rapid beating of my heart. I picked up my rhythm, punching harder and faster at this guy's face. He was grunting and gasping, trying to recover enough to fight back.

_Don't you understand what you're doing? You're hurting me! Every day I think about you, about how much I love you and miss you, about how I can't stand the thought of losing you. Lately, that's all I ever think is going to happen….that I'm going to lose you. _

I closed my eyes for a split second, willing the thoughts to please just go away. I saw the man reach to punch me, but I caught his arm, slamming it to the ground as hard as I could. He cried out as his arm cracked against the solid, uneven concrete.

_You never talk to me anymore! You never answer my phone calls! I just have to keep leaving these stupid fucking voicemails, hoping you're at least listening to them…I don't know what's going on Murphy! Look what you've done! You've ruined our marriage because of this. _

I quickly looked at the sky, making sure to hold the man's hands down while I let the angry tears slip back in. It made me angrier that I was breaking down like this, like some kind of pansy-man. I growled out in frustration, swinging at the side of his head again.

_"You finally answer my phone calls after two months!" Bri yelled in my ear, and I cringed. "And all you have to say for yourself is you think you'll be a bad father?"_

_ "There's more to i' than tha', Bri!" I exclaimed angrily. "Ya don' understand!" _

_ "Then help me understand!" she begged. "God, Murphy, don't just assume I won't understand! How can we ever make it work if-"_

_ "I kill people, Bri!" I interrupted her. "I kill people, an' I don' wan' me kid bein' exposed to tha'! Don' ya realize wha' tha' woul' mean? I'm no goo' fer 'im, Bri…" _

_ There was a silence. _

_ "What?" she asked softly. "And you think this is any better? That leaving your child, fatherless is better?_ _That leaving me all alone to raise our child is better for him?" _

_ "No-I-"_

_ "Murphy, you're hurting everyone! You're hurting Dylan, even though right now he doesn't know it! You're hurting Connor, because he can't help you! You're hurting me!" _

"Stop!" I yelled out loud, my eyes squeezed shut.

The man took this opportunity to break from my loosening grasp. He hurriedly reached into his pocket, pulling out a gun. He had his finger on the trigger, pointing right at me.

I snapped out of my haze, hastily reaching for my own gun. I twisted his arm, pushing it and the gun to the ground. He howled in pain as I slammed the rest of his body to the ground, saying something to me, but I wasn't listening, the sound of my own heart pounding in my ears was deafening. With his face pressed against the ground, I put the gun to his head and cocked it.

I pulled the trigger.

I stared for a moment, watching him twitch and then stop moving altogether. The blood flowed from his head, making a pool around his body. I still sat on him, nothing to break the silence but the sound of my own breathing.

"Oh God," I whispered, my face falling into my hands.


	4. Chapter 4

_**Author's Note: **_Ok guys, this chapter is pretty emotional. Alright, all of them were emotional, but still. This chapter took me literally four hours to write and another four to edit (thanks Kori :D!), but it was so worth it. I love writing this chapter, it really opened my eyes to a lot of emotions I had never thought about my characters feelings. Plus, I for the first time, explored Connor's character, which I really haven't had to do this entire series. (*squeal* I can't believe I'm writing a series!)

Anywho, I know you guys don't want to listen to me ramble. Happy reading :D!

**Chapter 4**

"'ey Doc!" Connor exclaimed, walking through the double doors of the bar.

"Hey there C-C-C-Connor," Doc replied from behind the counter, his face lighting up.

Connor surveyed the bar expectantly, glancing at the few people seated throughout. He looked confused as he turned to face Doc.

"Where's Murphy?"

Doc's eyebrows furrowed, "Was he s-s-s-supposed to be here?"

"I jus' figured 'e woul' be," Connor replied thoughtfully, scanning the bar once more.

"If ya want, fuck! ass!, I could try c-c-c-calling him?" Doc suggested, looking worried.

"Nah, i's ok," Connor waved away the suggestion, plopping down on a barstool, "'e can ta'e care 'o 'imself."

Doc poured him a shot, and Connor thanked him before throwing it back. They talked for a while, watching the customers slowly trickle out until there was no one left.

"So w-w-where's that Mexican of yours?" Doc asked, wiping down the counter.

"'e's gettin' connections," Connor replied with a grin, "'e knows all sor's o' people ou' 'ere. We're tryin' ta ge' any infermation we ca'."

The rag lay still on the smooth surface of the bar as Doc paused, looking up in confusion. "On w-w-what?"

"Wha' do ya mean on wha'? Connor asked with a laugh, "Haven' ya been watchin' the news? There's a-"

The doors of the bar flew open, banging loudly as it smacked against the wall. Connor and Doc jumped, Connor's arm dropping below the table, hand instinctively resting where his gun would be.

Murphy stood in the doorway, dripping from head to toe, the rain pouring outside behind him. He was breathing heavily, his chest falling in and out as he stared at the ground, almost shamefully. Connor looked him over quickly, noticing a mixture of blood stains and mud caked on his clothes.

"Murphy!" Connor exclaimed, scrambling off the bar stool, "Wha' 'appened? Ar' ya hur'?"

Connor reached him and put his hands on his shoulders, gently squeezing, but Murphy continued to stare at his blood-soaked shoes. Connor shook him slightly, trying to bring him to his senses. He slowly looked up at Connor. He tried not to gasp, seeing a bloody gash extending across Murphy's face and a dark bruise around his right eye.

"Connor….I fucked up…."

**~BDS~**

_I pushed open my apartment door, closing it behind me._ _As I turned to lock it, I noticed a piece of paper taped to the door, and I pulled it off slowly, staring at it a moment before I unfolded and read the single sentence written within." _

Open the fridge.

_ I moved my head to the side, my eyebrows furrowed. Open the fridge? Why? _

_ I knew in the back of my mind that this could be dangerous. I could open up the fridge, and there would be a bomb on the other end. I could open it and there would be absolutely nothing there, just a man who wants to rape me getting me in a convenient spot. My back would be basically to the whole house, so you could easily come up behind me and grab me or just sneak out. I was too curious not to look though. _

_ I made my way to the fridge, pausing for just a moment with my hand on the handle before pulling it open. Inside was a big bottle of sparkling white grape juice; one of my favorite drinks. I took it out curiously, and found another paper taped to the bottom of the bottle. _

Open the freezer.

_ I moved up to the freezer, smiling when I saw a carton of moosetracks ice cream sitting in the very middle. My favorite ice cream. I peeled off yet another note, which was taped to the bottom of the carton. _

Get the blanket off the couch.

_I went to the couch, the blanket neatly folded on one of the cushions. Had we actually folded the blankets for once? I shook my head; we definitely hadn't. I picked it up, shaking it out for another note. Sure enough, another folded piece of paper came tumbling out on to the ground. _

Open the DVD player.

_ What the-? I put down the note, walking to the DVD player. I turned it on, bouncing on my feet, waiting for it to start up. As soon as it was on I pressed the open button, now eager for what would be inside. It slipped open, and I laughed at the DVD inside; Lord of the Rings: The Two Towers. _

_ I took it out, a big grin on my face. There was a note, very small, taped to the bottom of it. I carefully peeled it off. _

Go to your bed.

_ I giggled, knowing exactly who this was now. I gathered all my things, bolting to my bedroom. _

_ "Murphy!" I exclaimed, seeing the love of my life sitting against the headboard of my bed. _

_ "'ey Bri," Murphy replied casually with a one-sided grin. _

_ I hurriedly put all the stuff on my dresser, running to my bed. He laughed as I tackled him, wrapping my arms around him and nuzzling my nose into his neck. _

_ "God, I missed you…" I mumbled, inhaling his familiar scent; cigarettes, beer, and freshly cut grass. _

_ "Happy birthday," he said softly, running his fingers through my hair. _

_ I just laughed, tears springing to my eyes. I hated crying, but it was the only reaction I could have at the moment. I was so overwhelmed, so happy that I was in his arms again. I tried getting a grip on myself, taking a few deep breaths. _

_ "Ya know, ya shoul' be a bi' more careful," Murphy teased, "Ya don' know wha' coulda been in tha' fridge." _

_ "I thought about that," I replied with a laugh, my voice still muffled by his neck, "but I was too curious not to look."_

_ "I knew ya woul' be," Murphy said, shaking his head as a small smile touched his lips. _

_ I finally lifted up to look at him. We just stared at each other for a moment, saying a thousand things without uttering a single word. I missed him so much; his dark messy hair, his bright blue eyes, that little bit of scruff that he pulled off so well, that one-sided grin, his cute button nose, his long eyelashes I had always been jealous of, the way he looked at me as if I was the most beautiful person in the world…._

_ "I love ya," Murphy broke the silence, caressing my cheek. _

_ "I love you too," I answered tearfully, taking his face into my hands and kissing him gently. _

_ Our lips moved together, and I couldn't get over how much I had missed this. He pulled me closer to him, and it was as if our bodies were made for one another; like two puzzle pieces put together. We continued our loving and gentle kisses, not wanting to go anywhere with it...yet that is. _

_ I pulled away, resting my forehead on his. I heard him sigh and I smiled, running my hand up and down his arm. _

_ "Did ya li'e yer presents?" he whispered, taking my other hand in his and absentmindedly playing with my fingers. _

_ "Yeah," I answered, rubbing my nose against his a couple times, "You know me so well. I didn't even know I told you what my favorite drink was!" _

_ "Ya didn'," Murphy said, "I jus' over'eard ya talkin' abou' i'. We were a' the store, an' ya picked up the boddle an' sai' 'ow ya lov' tha' stuff an' how ya on'y ge' ta drink i' on new year's eve."_

_ "Awww," I laughed, kissing him chastely on the lips, "You are the best husband a girl could ever have." _

_ He just laughed, pulling me in for another hug. I pushed him until he was laying down on the bed, and crawled on top of him. _

_ "Ya know, yer actin' li'e a horny teenager," Murphy said with a grin, watching me, "Yer no' a teenager anymore. Yer twen'y now." _

_ "Your almost out of your twenties," I teased back, my lips inches from his, "You'll be thirty in three years." _

_ "Oh shu' up," Murphy mumbled, lifting up to capture my lips in another kiss. _

I wiped the tears from my eyes, trying hard to pull myself together. I would not have a breakdown with my three year old fast asleep on my lap.

I looked down at him, running gentle fingers through his soft hair. He looked so much like his Dad; I couldn't deny that he was Murphy's kid if I wanted to. He had everything; the long lashed, small eyes, the button nose, the small mouth, the brown, naturally messy hair…

The apartment door opened, and I looked behind me to see Hailey walking in, a few bags in her hands.

"I went grocery shopping," she said happily, smiling at me.

I put a finger to my lips and motioning to Dylan.

"Sorry," she whispered, and I laughed, watching her make her way to the kitchen.

I heard her putting things away, then walk back into the living room. She sat down next to me, smiling at Dylan.

"How was your day?" Hailey asked.

"It was alright," I replied, looking away from her, "Same shit, different day, really."

Hailey nodded, and I knew she could tell something was wrong.

"Whatcha thinkin' about?" she questioned after a moment of silence.

I sighed, smiling at her; she always knew.

"I was just thinking that even though Murphy's not here," I took a deep breath, playing with Dylan's hair again, "I feel like I still have a little part of him with me. Dylan. He's always going to be here, always going to be my baby, and always going to be a part of Murphy."

"You've got to stop waiting on him, Bri," Hailey said softly, looking down at Dylan, "You've got to just let go, and move on with your life."

"I know," I agreed, exhaling deeply.

"You don't want Dylan remembering you as depressed and stressed all the time," she went on, "Even though you try to hide it, he can see it. We can _all_ see it."

I nodded, continuing to stroke Dylan's hair. I was trying not to cry; it seemed like I was _always_ trying not to cry.

"Just," Hailey hesitated, trying to word it in the gentlest way possible, "don't try to _forget _about him or anything, just….try to put him in the back of your mind right now. Dylan should be your first priority."

I nodded, knowing full well that she was right.

I just knew I couldn't do it.

**~BDS~**

"Wha' do ya mean ya fucked up?" Connor asked, looking at me in concern.

"I fucked up," I repeated, looking down at my feet again, "I….I hur' somebody…really ba'."

"Ya hur' somebody?" Connor sounded confused.

"I-" I hesitated, then took a deep breath, looking up at him, "I killed someone."

"Murphy, we kill people all ta time. Wha' are ya talkin' abou'?" he asked, frowning slightly. His eyebrows raised as he realized something. "Was 'e innocen'?"

"No' innocen'," I defended, though it was a weak attempt, "bu' he defini'ely didn' deserve ta die…"

"Murph'," Connor squeezed my shoulders again, staring into my eyes, "Jus' tell me wha' happened."

"Ya know tha' guy we saw stealin' tha' woman's purse?" I asked nervously.

Connor nodded.

"Well 'e's the guy," I looked at Connor, watching his reaction.

A flicker of shock went across features, his eyes flickering back down to my stained shirt, but he quickly composed himself, his face once again becoming neutral.

I told him everything; how I had found him, hunting him down, pinning him to the ground, yelling at him that I was going to teach him a lesson, beginning to beat him up.

"He whipped ou' a gun," I continued, playing with my hands, "an' I pushed 'is arm down befer he coul' even do anythin'. I-I shot 'im, Connor, I just shot him righ' t'ere."

"It wasn't your fault, Murph'. You didn't have a choice," Connor said, trying to comfort me.

"No, you don't understand," I stopped, still ashamedly looking down at my shaking hands. "I was plannin' on killin' 'im."

Connor's eyebrows raised, then fell to crinkle in confusion.

"Why?" he asked.

""I-I don't know. I jus'-I was so angry, bu' t'en he go' 'is gun ou' an' I sho' 'im in the 'ead. But, like ya said, I had no choice…I had ta- I had ta kill 'im…didn' I?"

Connor simply nodded solemnly, not saying anything, filling the moment with an uncomfortable silence. My hand moved to my pocket, still shaking as I pulled out my cigarettes. .

"Wha'd ya do wit' the body?" he asked, watching me light my cigarette.

"I was wearin' gloves," I replied, blowing the smoke out and letting the nicotine sweep through my system, "an' I made sure ta spray ammonia over all the bloo'. 'e still 'ad 'is gun in 'is 'and, so i' looks kinda li'e a suicide."

Connor nodded; this seemed to be the only thing he could do this whole time. I could read his thoughts, and I knew he was really worried about me. I knew he wouldn't bring it up to me though, just keep it to himself to ponder it over on his own. It killed me that we had resorted to keeping things from each other; it never used to be like that.

"Well," Connor sighed, grinning half-heartedly at me, "A' leas' yer no' gonna ge' caugh'."

I nodded, and he looked at me for a second, as if he was trying to read me instead of just see me. I felt uncomfortable under his gaze; if anyone could figure out what I was _really_ feeling, it was him. I was waiting for him to yell at me, waiting for the angry Connor to show and him to start going off about how I was being "reckless and ridiculous"; he and Ma's favorite descriptive words for me growing up.

I looked down, growing uneasy, when I felt his arms wrap around me. I was taken aback; he was hugging me? This wasn't like him at all. I had no idea how I should react.

After getting over my initial shock, I figured I should at least hug him back. I tossed my cigarette on the ground, quickly wrapping my arms around him. I clumsily looked over his shoulder, stretching my foot towards the cigarette, awkwardly stomping on it.

I then relaxed in his arms, feeling all of my stress slowly melt away. This was exactly what I needed; just someone to lean on, someone that I knew I could count on. I couldn't believe that I had forgotten Connor was there.

I rested my cheek on his shoulder, closing my eyes for just a moment. I felt ridiculous, a grown man hugging my brother like this; I was 33 years old after all. He didn't seem to mind though, so I squeezed him back, lifting my head from his shoulder.

"T'anks, Connor," I mumbled, hoping he knew how grateful I really was.

Connor nodded, then pulled away, giving me a big smile, and a clap on the shoulder.

"Le's 'ave a drin'. I've got just the thing to cheer ya up" he said, grinning mischievously.

"Alrigh'," Connor whispered, as we all crouched uncomfortably behind big metal barrels, "'ere's the plan."

I rolled my eyes, knowing this was sure to be interesting.

"Murph' an' I walk in, an' Romeo, yer by the for'lif', wit' yer gun in yer han'. Yer gonna snea' up on the guy on the for'lif' an' knock 'im ou' wit' yer gun."

Romeo nodded, while I tried to picture this all going down.

"Then we climb in the cra'e on the for'lif' an' Romeo, yer gonna drive us towards those men o'er there, workin' on the drugs."

I shook my head, seeing many things that could go wrong already.

"We'll break open the to' o' the cra'e, and star' shootin' a' all the guys. Then we'll jum' outta the cra'e, may'e do a liddle flip er somethin'."

I tried not to laugh, putting a hand over my mouth to hide the growing smile on my face; this was so over-the-top. Probably from another one of his fuckin' movies.

"We ge' ou', go ta Doc's fer a sho' o' irish, we're a' home in time fer tacos," he clapped his hands, looking proud, "Tha's wha' we do, huh?"

I looked away from him, shaking my head again as he awaited my response.

"What?" he asked.

"Well i-i-i's jus' this plan…" I stuttered.

"Wha' the fuck's wrong wit' the plan?"

"It…I's…" I struggled to find the right words.

"Genius," Romeo finished my sentence, his eyes widening, "I can even drive an f-lift man, got my class D license and everything."

"Tha's the fuckin' spiri'," Connor said enthusiastically.

I decided to just go with it. After all, what's the worst that could happen?


	5. Chapter 5

**Author's Note: **This chapter is HUGE! literally 32 words away from 5,000! Anyways, just to warn you, there are a bunch of scenes from the movie directly in here. I added my own little two cents into them, but most of them are straight from the movie. NothingIsTrue helped me with those, fucking awesome she is. Yeah this chapter is by far my favorite, and I hope you guys like it as much as we liked creating it. Enjoy :D!

**Chapter 5**

"It's them."

Eunice stood up, slowly taking her earplugs out to look at the three men. Greenly sighed, shaking his head while looking dejectedly at his feet. Dolly and Duffy smirked on either side of him; it was always funny when Greenly was wrong.

"A wise man once told me," she began seriously, pacing among the dead bodies laid across the floor. "When a man's actions are firmly bound to an unshakable faith, one's worst nightmares become sudden, terrifying reality."

"So," Duffy said as Euncie stopped too look down, "What happened here?"

"Well first, they had to get the man driving this forklift out of their way," she continued, seeing something on the ground the three men couldn't, "Which it looks like they didn't need to kill him."

_"Ah! You didn't have to bash me in the skull!" the dock worker exclaimed, angrily gripping his head._

"_Sorry, man, we got a plan going here," Romeo didn't sound the least bit sorry, holding his gun to show the man, "Technically, I was supposed to knock you out, but they gave me this faggoty little gun, see, and the weight's just not uh…" _

_He turned the gun in his hands, looking at it skeptically._

"_Christ, that's a gun? Why didn't you just point it at me and say 'scram'?" he asked, looking at Romeo exasperatedly. _

_Connor whipped out his gun, getting frustrated with this back and forth bullshit. _

"_SCRAM! Ge' the fuck ou' o' 'ere! NOW!" _

"Something went wrong, though," she went on, following the dark tire marks streaked across the floor.

The three men watched her pace wonderingly, letting her continue her theory. It's not like they were going to come up with anything better.

"What's the _symbolism_ here?" Dolly asked, clearing his throat with a smirk on his face.

"Symbolism?" she asked, looking surprised.

"Yeah," he looked smug; he was actually using the word _right _this time. "What does this symbolize?"

"Well it _symbolizes_," Eunice answered, putting emphasis on the word, "a _huge_ fuck up. This was a plan that fell to pieces. A lot of it don't make sense, which is why it all makes perfect sense."

"_Chris', wha' the fuck's he doin'?" Murphy yelled, desperately clinging to the wall of the crate as the forklift swerved dangerously to the right. _

"_I don' know. Hang on, fucks sake!" Connor peaked through a hole in the crate, watching Romeo steer wildly with fear in his eyes. "Chris', he can' fuckin' see where 'e's goin'!"_

"_Aw, shit! Tell 'im ta go lef' now! Tell 'im!" Murphy exclaimed, frantically waving his arm at Connor._

"_Go lef'! Go lef'!" Connor yelled._

"_What?" Romeo asked, turning the wheel in random directions. _

"_Tha' way! Go tha' way!" Connor wiggled a gloved finger through the hole, pointing left. _

"_Left? Fuck!" Romeo veered sharply to the left, sending Connor and Murphy flying to the side of the crate. _

"Now, wait just a minute!" Greenly spoke up for the first time, listening to Eunice's theory bitterly. "That doesn't make any sense. Why the hell would they use a damn forklift?"

She glared at him, continuing as if he hadn't said a word.

"_You've go' ta visualize the end resul'! You've go' ta force i' inta reality!" Connor yelled passionately, "Believe! You've go' ta fuckin' believe!"_

"_I'm about to believe my fist right up your fucking ass!" Murphy snapped at him, shaking hisfist threateningly._

"_You'll do what?" Connor was shocked, "Not a believer!"_

_They rolled around the crate, each of them trying to get the upper hand as they threw punches and kicks at one another._

"_That's another thing! Don't be down at me, 'cause I'm right fucking there, man!" Romeo was saying, completely oblivious to what was going on._

"_You've go' ta believe!" Connor yelled, still struggling with his brother._

"_This bitch is fast-a-rooney," Romeo joked, still randomly turning the wheel without a clue as to where he was going. _

_The mobsters spotted the forklift, watching it in complete confusion as it swerved wildly in random directions. Romeo flipped a switch, raising the brothers high into the air. He saw the break in their path and desperately slammed on the brakes. The forklift came to sudden halt, toppling forward and sending the crate hurtling into the ditch in the ground._

"Boys," Eunice went on dramatically, "I believe things in our fair little city just got downright biblical."

Duffy walked off and headed towards Forensics, leaving Greenly and Dolly to listen.

"What do you mean?" Greenly asked.

"There was obviously a shootin' at this point. I'm assumin' they opened fire, and as you can see, they hit all of their targets."

She motioned towards the dead bodies, still caked in blood with pennies over their eyes.

"Ballistics just dug it out," Duffy said happily, returning with a small bag between his fingers, which he handed to Eunice.

"A .22?" she asked, inspecting the small bullet, "You've gotta be kidding me. That's like bringin' a knife to a gunfight."

"Yeah," Greenly piped in, trying to impress Eunice, "or like bringing a really small gun….to a….gunfight."

The three of them paused for a moment, staring at him before looking back at the small bullet.

"I don't know, Ballistics is reading three shooters, and this is one of them," Duffy went back to the task at hand, used to Greenly's idiocy.

"I find it hard to believe that one of the three most lethal individuals on the planet just switched over to birdshot," Eunice replied skeptically.

"Maybe we're reading this wrong. Priest was a frame job, right?" Dolly suggested.

"Yeah, maybe somebody's trying to eliminate some competition here?" Duffy added.

"Yeah," Greenly put his two cents in.

Eunice stopped to think, walking forward. They all three put their hands behind their backs, fingers crossed.

"No, sir," she shook her head, "it's them."

**~BDS~**

_"Yeah! You've just been paid, so split now!" _

_Connor crept toward the tanning bed, gun clutched in his hand. Murphy jumped suddenly onto the tanning bed, also holding a gun as he waited for Connor's next move. The man groaned in pain, struggling against the lid now crushing his body. _

"_Lovely singin' voice there, Georgie," Connor mocked, pointing his gun underneath the lid, "We'd like ya ta sing fer us. Can ya do t'at for me?"_

"_Yeah," George tried to respond, his voice muffled._

"_Can ya do tha' for me?" Connor asked again, now yelling and shaking his gun at George's head. _

"_Yeah, yeah!" George yelled, wiggling desperately. _

_Connor tapped the top of the tanning bed with his gun, giving Murphy the signal to hop off. George rolled off the tanning bed, landing face first on the floor. _

"_It's getting hard to be a gentleman of fucking leisure around here!" he complained. _

_Murphy grabbed him by the hair, yanking him off the floor. He and Connor slammed him against the wall, each holding down one outstretched arm. Each pressed the barrel of the guns to the center of George's hands, Connor on the right and murphy on the left_

"_I wan' the name of the shooter you mother_fuckers _used on tha' pries'!" Murphy shouted._

"_What priest?" George asked. _

_Murphy's face contorted in anger; He'd had enough of this shit. Using his free hand, he whacked George across the face; hard._

"'_is fuckin' name!" Murphy screamed angrily. _

"_I don't know who it is!" George insisted, continuing to panic. _

"_That's fucking bullshit!" Romeo said, watching the scene from afar. _

_They stepped back simultaneously, only holding George back with their guns on his hands._

"_It's the truth!" George was begging now, looking close to tears he was so terrified. "Concezio didn't tell nobody what he was doing, 'cause he knew nobody would have okayed it! The shooters an' independent contractor! That's all I fucking know!"_

_Connor grabbed the necklace around George's neck, pulling it so tight it was choking him._

"_Where ta fuck is Yakavetta hidin'?" Connor didn't handle bullshit very well. _

"_Prudential Building, 40th floor," George gasped, just before the phone rang. "Jesus Christ!"_

_Romeo picked up the phone, throwing it to Murphy. He caught it, reading the text message._

"_Ya meetin' someone tonigh'?" Murphy interrogated, tossing Connor the phone. _

"_Yakavetta's racket chiefs. Street guys. Your kind of guys? You could take a real bite out of crime here. And I can help you." George was really desperate now. _

"_Wha' ta fuck is tha'?" Connor asked, hitting him lightly in the head with his phone._

"_Nobody forgot what you guys did to us last time. Everybody's hiding indoors. They give out the location an hour before," he explained._

"_My uncle's place is closed tonight. I got the key." Romeo suggested. _

"'_ow's Mexican work for ya, George? Do ya li'e tha'?" Connor asked, slapping him lightly again._

"_Doesn't matter to me. I think I just shit my European-cut Speedos," George groaned. _

_Murphy pulled a long piece of duct tape, biting the end and ripping it off. Connor had a paintbrush in hand, writing something on George's back._

"_These dagos are getting antsy, man," Romeo complained, entering the room. "I'm getting spicarooed and pepe'd."_

"_All right, calm the fuck down," Connor replied, turning to point the paint brush at him. "You got ta stick i' out. Jus' wait on one more."_

_Murphy ripped another piece of duct tape off with his teeth, and Connor went back to painting, trying to keep himself entertained while waited for the last guy to show up._

_When they were done, they both pulled their guns out, just waiting. Connor stood and watched while Murphy sat up on the counter._

"_All righ', the gang's all 'ere," Connor said at last, walking towards the door. _

_Murphy looked behind him quickly, and then cocked the gun, following after Connor. _

"Ok, but that still doesn't explain why I'm crouched behind a bar," Hailey said, looking at Connor confused. "Why am I not drinking if I'm at the bar?"

She reached for the bottle of Captain Morgan underneath the bar, about to pop it open.

"Would ya knock i' off?" he snapped, irritated and ripping the bottle out of her hands.

"What?" Hailey asked, a grin on her face.

"Wouldya jus' listen fer a secon'? I'm tryin' ta explain-"

"There's no explaining why I'm in a bar without booze," Hailey cut him off, trying to reach for the bottle.

"I can' 'ave ya drunk off yer ass, we're tryin' ta do somethin' 'ere-"

"I'm not gonna get drunk, I just want a drink-"

"Yer bein' silly, there's a reason we're behin' 'ere ya know-"

"I'm not gonna get that drunk, come on, Connor-"

"Wha' are ya, an alcoholi'? Yer-"

"Rude! I'm trying to enjoy what this place is actually made for, instead of playing hide and seek like some kind of child-"

"I'm no' actin' li'e a child, I jus' don' wanchya drinkin'-"

"Woul' you two shu' i'?" I hissed at them, my ears perking at the sound of car doors slamming.

They both froze, Hailey halfway on top of Connor. He was still holding the bottle of rum out of her reach, a guilty look on both of their faces.

"They're coming," Romeo said over his shoulder, standing on the other side of the bar.

"What's going-?"

Connor put a hand over Hailey's mouth, and she glared at him.

The doors opened, and I could hear them all coming inside. I waited for their reaction to Romeo, a slow grin spreading on my face. I took a drag of my cigarette, exchanging looks with Connor. He grinned back at me and took his hand from Hailey's mouth, both of us grabbing a beer spout.

Hailey looked confused, but stayed silent. I saw Connor smile sweetly at her before kissing her quickly on the lips. She turned red, and it looked like all had been forgiven. I shook my head, turning away and taking another drag.

"What is this? What is this? Who the fuck are you? You're either vice or IAD. Your IAD, aren't you?" I heard Dolly panic, and I tried to keep my laughing under control. "Okay, come on, fucking arrest us! Arrest us! I'm ready! Come on out!"

Connor exchanged small grins before jumping from behind the bar, yelling happily. We sprayed them with beer, watching as they quickly tried blocking the beer from hitting them.

"Hands above your head!" Connor shouted, while Eunice laughed in the background, leaning up against the bar.

I saw Hailey out of the corner of my eye, standing up and to peek over the edge of the bar. She must've thought there was going to be something dangerous going on here. I laughed as I watched Dolly slip and fall to the floor.

"Stop it! God damn it!" Duffy yelled, desperately trying to keep the beer from going in his eyes.

"Ya don't write! Ya don' fuckin' call?" Connor exclaimed after we stopped spraying.

"You shoul' be ashamed o' yerselves!" I added happily, taking a puff of my cigarette with a smile on my face.

"Get the fuck out of here!" Greenly laughed, looking between the two of us.

"You knew all along," Duffy said weakly, pointing at Eunice.

"No' keepin' in touch wit' yer ol' friends!" I said.

"Shame on you!" Connor agreed, pointing accusingly at them.

"Fucking bitch! You beautiful babe!" Dolly crawled across the floor, wrapping his arms around Eunice's waist, "Thank you! Thank you!"

I looked around, everyone chatting and having a drink. Everyone except Hailey, who was currently shooting daggers with her eyes at Connor, her arms crossed. Connor didn't even seem to notice, looking over Eunice's shoulder at a paper she had handed him.

"This the fellow?" he asked, sitting closer than was really necessary to look at it.

"That's the fellow," Eunice nodded, a small smile on her face, no doubt from the attention she was getting from Connor, "He's a Sicilian immigrant, name of Ottilio Panza."

I caught Hailey's eye, and she gave me a look that clearly said "I'm going to kill him if you don't do something right. Now." I sighed; I figured I should probably help her out.

"Five, five? 'e's a shor' bastard isn' 'e?" I asked, leaned back as if I was looking at the paper while really I was trying to get Connor's attention.

"Yes...and well put. He'll be front"page news in the morning but we have to assume Yakavetta already knows we've ID'd his guy. We can't give him time to 'Plan B' us."

I forgot about Hailey for the moment as I looked at Connor and Eunice, sidetracked by their conversation.

"We're hittin' him tomorrow night. That soon enough?"

"Should be," Eunice nodded, "Where's it gonna happen?"

"The Pru," Connor replied.

"The Prudential Building? What are you, cracked?" Dolly asked, looking at him in disbelief.

"Why don't you just do it on center ice at a fucking Bruin's game?" Greenly added.

"Tha's where the man is, so tha's where we're goin'. No guts, no glory, Green Beans."

"In fac', we coul' use a few extra han's...that is, i' ya boys can still ge' yer Irish on," I smirked, looking at the three men with raised eyebrows.

"Hey, I got balls for days, pally. I'm a fucking sack-o-matic," Greenly proclaimed, causing all of us to burst out laughing.

"We're in." Dolly and Duffy both agreed.

"Well, you boys have fun. Connor, Murphy, escort a lady to the door?" Eunice asked, looking between the two of us.

I remembered Hailey again, as I offered Eunice one of my arms, watching her link arms on the other side with Connor. I looked over my shoulder, and the look on her face even scared _me_. She was staring at Connor and Eunice's linked arms, her face turning a slow red. I caught her eye again, giving her an apologetic grimace before facing forward.

"Doc, can I have a beer?" I hear her mumble, and I laughed softly under my breath.

"Y'sure you don' wanna 'ear the plan?" Connor asked as she finally let go of us and stood in front of the door. "I'm no' tryin' ta brag, bu' this one's a real Picasso."

"Jesus," he thought I was joking, but I couldn't believe how much he was flirting with this girl; the sad thing was, he didn't even realize what he was doing. I shook my head at how naïve he could be sometimes.

"Shu' yer hole," Connor said quickly, pointing at me.

"No, I want to critique your masterpiece with fresh eyes," Eunice answered with a smile, "Besides, school night. Got some homework to do."

"Wha's the matter?" I asked, turning my head to the side slightly.

"Panza knew you were in there tonight, and he just let it happen," Eunice said, looking seriously between the two of us, "I mean, if he's working for Yakavetta, why would he stand by and just watch all his men get taken out?"

"Ya think may'e we go' another fox in the 'en 'ouse, 'ere?" Connor asked.

"Starting to look that way. Somebody pushed that visa through. Could have ourselves a genuine 'Ghost in the Darkness,' here," Eunice ended on that note, giving us a short wave before heading out the door.

We rounded the corner, a seething Hailey hugging her beer to her chest. She took a small sip, only glancing at us before continuing to stare at the wall.

"'ey!" Connor plopped down next to her, grinning.

She ignored him, only looking at him for a half a second before going back to drinking her beer. He stared at her, the grin slowly starting to fade. I started laughing hysterically, watching as Hailey continued to act as if he didn't exist. Connor wasn't used to being ignored; it was great watching him try to figure out what he had done wrong.

"I'm gonna go smoke," Hailey mumbled, scooting away from Connor and walking away.

"But you can smoke in…." he trailed off, watching her retreating back, "here."

The door closed with a click, and he stared at it in disbelief.

"Wha'd I do?" he asked, looking at me desperately.

I just chuckled, shaking my head. Sometimes, he could be so clueless.

**~BDS~**

"G'night, mommy," Dylan whispered, and I smiled at him before closing the door.

I sighed, leaning my forehead against it for a moment. _Finally_.

It had been a long day, filled with grape juice spills, not making it to the potty, refusing to take a nap, and a temper tantrum by dinner time about absolutely nothing. I couldn't believe it was 8:00 and I was about to pass out; I was getting old.

The door opened, around three in the morning and Hailey tip toed in as quiet as she could. I sat up quickly, not even remembering falling asleep.

"Hey," I said. "How was it?"

"It was…interesting," she sighed, plopping down on the couch next to me.

"How so?" I asked.

"Well _Connor_," she began, saying his name through gritted teeth, "was being an ass. Turns out, that girl that's after them is on their side. Whore."

"Uh, why is she a whore?" I asked, laughing at the resentful look on Hailey's face.

"She was all over him!" Hailey exclaimed, "He wasn't helping matters either, looking over her shoulder so he could 'read the paper'"

She put "read the paper" in quotations with her fingers, mocking his voice to make him sound like an idiot. I laughed, no idea what she was talking about.

"-then she's like 'will you boys walk me to the door?', this stupid fucking smirk on her face," Hailey went on, "and there they are, walking to the door on either one of her arms."

"Wait, Murphy too?" I asked, feeling some of the resentment she was talking about.

"Yeah," she nodded.

"Bitch," I muttered.

We laughed, shaking our heads at our ridiculousness. We knew better than to think they were _those_ kind of guys.

As jealous as I was that Hailey got to see so much of them, it also made me happy. She always gave me the inside scoop on the both of them, and I always got to hear about Murphy and know he was ok. It was a sick little system we had going, like she was feeding me my addiction, but I didn't mind. I made her promise to be nice to him, even though I knew she would much rather punch him in the face.

"We made up, don't worry," Hailey added, smiling at the thought, "He had no idea. Fucking idiot, he was completely clueless when I started screaming at him."

"I'm surprised he was able to say anything at all," I laughed, "You're fucking scary when you're mad."

She laughed, saying something about an "Irish temper."

"So just tell me," I said seriously, changing the mood after our laughter died down, "are they planning on doing anything dangerous anytime soon?"

"Uh," Hailey looked uneasy, her eyes shifting away from me, "it's funny you should say that…."

_I tried not to get claustrophobic, staying focused on the main plan. I heard the elevator door ding, and Romeo quickly roll the laundry cart inside. The doors closed, and Romeo quickly lifted the wooden lid off so we could climb out. I took a thankful breath of air, quickly pulling myself up and out of the cart, Connor right behind me._

_We put the propped the lid on the cart, using it as a table so we could get our guns ready. I was really starting to feel it now; the adrenaline that only comes with a good mission. _

_I watched Romeo, who was avoiding everyone's eyes as he got his own guns ready. He was looking emotional, and it was pissing me off; he needed to learn to be a man. _

"_Wha'?" I finally asked him, seeing him once again look quickly away from me. _

"_Nothing," Romeo answered unconvincingly._

"_What is the matter wit' ya?" Connor asked, staring at Romeo critically. _

"_Nothing!" Romeo repeated defensively, shifting his eyes around to the floor while bouncing on his feet, "This is just some heavy shit, that's all. I'm just…I'm just having a period of adjustment."_

"_Yer abou' ta 'ave a period o' gettin' yer ass bea'!" I threatened angrily, raising my fist at him._

"_This is you," Connor snapped at him, as the elevator dinged and the doors slid open, "Fuckin' be on time."_

_Romeo backed out of the elevator, and Connor pointed to his wrist with his gun. I hit the button, and the elevator doors closed. We stood next to each other, silently watching the floor number at the top of the elevator get higher and higher._

"_You ready for this shit, my dear brother?" Connor asked me. _

_I stared ahead, a look of intensity on my face. I turned slightly, raising my gun and cocking it, letting it go quickly. The chamber snapped back into place, and I reveled in the excitement just that little sound gave me. I twitched my neck to the side, loosening my muscles and then straightening it back._

"_Le's do some gratuitous violence."_

"_What_?" I exclaimed disbelievingly, listening to this ridiculous plan, "Then what are they gonna do? Just hide in the shadows until they feel like jumping out and scaring them?"

"Well Duffy and Greenly went in the elevators too," Hailey explained, "they're going to…uh…help them with the lift outside…"

"Wait, their gonna ride on a lift, _outside_ the building?" I asked, my eyes widening.

"Yeah," Hailey sighed, "they're planning on taking it down to the floor they need. They're tying themselves up in rope though-"

"Rope?" I interrupted, shaking my head. "Is this one of Connor's stupid plans?"

"Hey now," Hailey tried to defend him, but I could tell she agreed with me, "you don't see Murphy coming up with anything."

"Yeah he's just as dumb for following through," I agreed, "so what's the next part?"

"Well then they just…break in I guess," Hailey said, sounding unsure, "start shooting people. You know, kick ass, take names, the usual."

I nodded slowly, my eyebrows furrowed as I thought it over. Didn't anybody think about the ten thousand things that could go wrong?

"You know now that I think about it," Hailey said thoughtfully, "His plan sounds just like that movie-"

_"The Eiger Sanction with Clint Eastwood," Connor confessed, not looking at anyone, obviously embarrassed._

"_Fuck!" Greenly exclaimed, throwing his head back in frustration._

"_And it worked like a charm for him!" Connor defended himself, his face turning bright red in anger._

_"Ah, I fuckin' _knew_!" I yelled, throwing my arms in the air. I couldn't believe he had come up with another one of these stupid plans again. Why did I even listen to him in the first place?_

_The lift jolted to a halt, and I froze. _

"_What the fuck did you do?" Connor asked Greenly, and we both spun around to stare at him._

"_I don't know, it just stopped," Greenly replied, looking around._

"_Well, fucking get it going again!" I exclaimed, still pissed off that this whole plan was going to shit. I was going to start making the plans…_

"_It won't turn back on! It just died!" Greenly said, trying to fiddle with the controls but knowing it was no use._

"_Shit!"_

"You've gotta be kidding me!" I yelled, now pacing around the living room. "That is by far, the _dumbest _plan I have ever heard!"

"I know, I know," Hailey agreed, "but, you know Connor, once he's got his mind set to something. Plus, Murphy just listens to whatever he says, so of course he's not gonna argue-"

"I've gotta call him," I mumbled, frantically checking my pockets for my cell phone. "I've gotta call Murphy."

"He's not gonna answer-"

"Where's my phone…" I headed to the kitchen, choosing to ignore Hailey's logic.

"Bri, they've been through much worse than this-"

"Gotcha," I grabbed my phone off the sofa, flipping it open and pressing one on the speed dial.

Hailey sighed, knowing it was no use and reaching for the remote.

_"You guys can't do this!" Greenly exclaimed, trying to talk some sense into us. "Are you fucking crazy?" _

_We were definitely crazy. I looked down, seeing just how high up we really were. I took a deep breath, closing my eyes for a moment, then opening them again._

"_Time!" I yelled, making sure the rope was tight around me. I couldn't believe we were doing this…_

"_Jesus Christ, seven seconds!" Connor yelled, and we moved closer to the edge of the lift._

"_Holy shit," Duffy said softly in the background. _

_We exchanged looks and I nodded the answer to Connor's unspoken question; yeah, I was gonna be ok. He looked just a little less afraid, beginning the countdown._

"_Six."_

"Murphy, god dammit! You can't ignore my phone calls forever! Don't do this! You can't go through with this; you're going to fucking die! Life isn't the movies Murphy! It doesn't work that way…"

_"-five-"_

"I wish it did, because by now you would've been here. This whole, I'm-a-bad-influence bullshit would've been over by now and you'd _be _here!"

_"-four-"_

"But no, you're off hanging thousands of feet in the air on some lift, planning on busting in and killing shit tons of armed and ready men! What the fuck is wrong with you, Murph'? Since when are you so fucking stupid?"

_"-three-"_

"Great, now you've got me crying, are you happy now? I specifically remember you telling me you would never make me cry, and now look at me. I'm a fucking wreck because of you! Raising _our_ kid by myself while you prance around being a 'bad influence'…."

_"-two-"_

"I'm done; just do whatever the fuck you want. I love you ok? I just wish you'd show me you love me too every once in a damn while."

_"-one!"_

_I jumped, closing my eyes as my stomach flew into my throat. _

_If I died, that could very well be the last thing I ever heard Bri say._

I flipped the phone closed, not able to meet Hailey's eyes. I sat down next to her in silence, trying to subtly wipe my tears away. Of the countless messages I had left, I never knew if he heard a single one.

I hoped this time, he would listen.


	6. Chapter 6

**Author's Note:** Oh my gosh, I am SO sorry it's taken so long. I was on spring break this week, and you'd think that would be an excuse to update MORE, but I was kinda sorta too busy gettin' me irish on ;) lol! Anyways, this chapter is SUPER INTENSE! And definitely earns this story's M rating if you know what I mean *wiggles eyebrows suggestively*...*cough* Anywho! I hope you guys like this, I really enjoyed writing it. And even though NothingisTrue's computer crapped out on her and deleted all of her edits, she still went back and re-edited it for me just so we could have it posted by today :D! Yeah I know, she's fuckin awesome :)

Enjoy!

**Chapter 6**

We busted through the glass, and all I could think about was how crazy all this was. My guns in hand, I was sliding across the floor on my knees, shooting without really aiming. I didn't give a fuck about these guys; I needed them dead. Never had I had such an urge to kill before; it was an adrenaline rush like never before. As much as I wanted to enjoy it, all I could think about was how much I wanted this to end.

How much I wanted it _all _to end.

All these guys running for their lives, they were just wasting my time. They just needed to stop running away, 'cause they knew Connor and I would kick their asses. They _knew_, and yet they still ran and ducked, as if their measly hands would actually be able to block the bullets from getting into their heads.

It wasn't that I didn't believe what we were doing was right, or that it wasn't really necessary. I just needed to be somewhere else right now. I didn't need to be here, didn't need to be killing these guys, didn't need to be playing hero tonight.

I needed to be with Bri.

It wasn't until I was gripping that rope for dear life, not knowing what the end would be as I flew through the air, that I realized it. This boondock saints thing we had going on….it was not nearly as important to me as she was. For some reason, I had thought that staying away from her, not talking to her, would somehow protect her. That being away from me was better for her.

_I specifically remember you telling me you would never make me cry, and now look at me. I'm a fucking wreck because of you!_

I flinched internally, turning slightly on my knees as I continued to mindlessly pull the trigger. There was a rhythm to it now, and I didn't have to think about it too much. All I could think about was that voicemail she had left, so much different than all the other ones. She'd left me ones crying, she'd left me one begging, she'd even left me one where she just stayed on the line because she didn't know what else to say.

_This whole, I'm-a-bad-influence bullshit would've been over by now and you'd _be _here!"_

Those words cut right through my chest, and it took me a second to realize all the bullets in my gun were gone. I glanced at them, then got up, Connor doing the same. We grabbed Yakavetta by the shirt, threw him to his knees, and I was more ready than I had ever been. I yanked my rosary out from under my shirt, my gun already pointed at his head. I was ready for this mother fucker to die.

"And Shepherds we shall be. For thee, my Lord, for thee. Power hath descended forth from Thy hand. Our feet may swiftly carry out thy commands. So we shall flow a river forth to Thee and teeming with souls shall it ever be. In Nomine Patri, et Fili."

We cocked our guns as one, the sound echoing in my ears. God, I loved that fucking sound.

"Rottinculo," Yakavetta whispered, and we paused for a half-second.

"Et Spiritus Sancti."

We pulled the trigger simultaneously, and I watched with a sense of accomplishment as he fell to the ground, the blood spilling from his head. All I could think about was how much I wanted to get the fuck out of there. After all this time, I realized it wasn't killing that was going to get rid of this anger, this sadness, this frustration.

I needed to see her.

**~BDS~**

I lost track of the hours that had passed. Three, four, five, it didn't really matter; each one was just as unbearable as the last. Even Hailey got tired of my twitching, and muttered something about going to get some smokes. She'd been gone for almost an hour now, but I could hardly blame her; I wasn't exactly pleasant to be around.

I was staring at the TV, the room dark except for the glow of the screen against the walls. I stared at it for hours and not once would I have been able to tell you what was on. My eyes were glazed over while I hugged my pillow, every once in a while checking my phone for a call that never came.

Another round of tears and I simply let them fall, reaching mindlessly to wipe them away. It was sad really that at this point, the tears did nothing for me anymore. They just slid down my cheeks and I wiped them away, trying hard to push away the thoughts that caused them.

This emotional rollercoaster had exhausted me. My eyes were beginning to grow heavy, slowly closing. Suddenly, I was snapped awake by a knock at the door. I wasn't expecting anyone and it was almost two in the morning. I slowly got off the couch, another knock on the door. It wasn't urgent or rushed; it was slow and almost hesitant, like someone was afraid to be there.

I made my way slowly to the door, tossing my pillow back on the couch. I unlocked the bolt on the door, my hands shaking as I reach for the door knob. I twisted it inch by inch until it wouldn't twist anymore, then hesitantly pulled it towards me. I watched as the person was slowly revealed; black boots, dirty Levi jeans, the opened side of a black pea coat, a black shirt underneath, scruffy chin, thumbnail in mouth being relentlessly gnawed on, a button nose, sad blue eyes, and a head of messy dark brown hair.

"Murphy," I breathed.

**~BDS~**

I was going to apologize.

I was going to beg her for forgiveness, get on my hands and knees, cry if I had to. I was going to let her scream at me, let her yell and punch and scratch at me. I was going to let her tear my heart apart, and tell me she never wanted to see me again.

I was going to let her treat me the way I deserved to be treated.

But then she opened the door and breathed my name and there were tears still clinging to her cheeks. I was staring into those big brown eyes, pink from the tears I had caused. She was in some baggy t-shirt and a pair of grey sweatpants. She was still clutching the door and was staring at me with a look I couldn't read.

I don't know what made me do it. Maybe it was remembering the first time I saw her, and the way my heart jumped in my throat. Maybe it was the remembering the first time we kissed, and how happy she could make me. Maybe it was seeing in her eyes that she loved me just as much as I loved her.

I was going to let her scream at me and tell me how much I had hurt her. I was going to tell her how sorry I was for what I had done and how much I missed and loved her. I was going to say what I needed to say and let her decide what happened next.

But instead I closed the distance between us, placing my hands on her cheeks and pressing my lips against hers.

**~BDS~**

Oh god.

The feeling of his lips against mine was indescribable. The rush of emotions, the beating of my heart, the rhythm we had never forgotten as we moved as one; it was all so much and so amazing. I pulled him by the shoulders, squeezing them tightly as I kicked the door closed.

I ran my hands up his neck and the sides of his face, letting them slide through that hair I had missed so much. An involuntary moan slipped through my mouth and he deepened the kiss, turning his head to the side.

My chest was aching and before I could stop them, tears were flowing from my closed eyes. I whimpered, wrapping my arms around his neck to pull him as close to me as possible. It was too good to be true, it was too much for me to handle. I wanted so desperately for him to be real, but I was afraid this was all a dream. That I had fallen asleep on that sofa, and when I opened my eyes, he would be gone…

He broke off the kiss and I still had my eyes closed, sighing at the feeling of his forehead pressed against mine. The tears continued to stream down my cheeks and he leaned in slowly to kiss them away.

"Bri," he whispered, kissing me chastely on the lips. "Bri, come on, why 're ya cryin'?"

The sound of his voice was intoxicating and all I could do was shake my head as he rubbed up and down my arms.

"Bri, please," he sounded desperate, and he kissed my lips again. "Yer killin' me-"

"It's not you," I whispered shakily. "It's not you, I know it, it can't be-"

"Bri, i's me, I promise. I's your husband, i's Murphy-"

I furiously shook my head, in the back of my mind knowing how childish I was being.

"Open yer eyes," he whispered against my lips. "Open 'em, come on, 'm righ' 'ere."

I took a shuddering breath, then slowly lifted my eyelids.

He was there. He was looking at me, his light blue eyes filled with concern and his face inches from my own. I just stared at him, and he searched my eyes, trying to figure out what I was thinking.

"Bri," he said my name again, and I could see the desperation on his face, "'m sorry. 'm sorry fer everythin', 'm sorry fer-"

I pressed my lips against his, cutting him off. I didn't want to listen to the apologies or the begging. I didn't want to talk or discuss the hard stuff. I wanted to feel him, love him, be held in his arms again.

I didn't want to deal with the bullshit yet.

He was hesitant at first, but I wouldn't let him stay like that. I deepened the kiss almost immediately, and he responded eagerly, his hands running through my messy hair. I moved from his lips and across his jaw, letting my tongue drag slowly down his neck. He moaned, moving his hands from my hair to my waist. Before I had time to think, he had pressed me against the door, and his lips were back on mine.

I was about to run my fingers through that addictive hair of his, when he lifted my arms above my head. He held my wrists together with one hand, pressing them against the door as he moved his mouth down my neck. He moved his mouth to my ear, licking the outside of it before nipping at it lightly. I bent my head to the side, my hands struggling against his grasp.

"Mm Mm," he hummed in my ear. "I's my turn righ' now."

I let out a groan of frustration as he moved his hand down my side. I was helpless and I fucking loved it. He let go of my wrists, but I left them up there, letting his hands wander down all the right places of my body. Down my sides, up my back, back to the front to rub my shoulders, up to my hair running his fingers slowly through the strands; he was so fucking _good_ at this.

He pressed his body against mine and we moaned together, his lips meeting mine for another fiery kiss. I finally moved my arms down, putting my fingers through the belt loops of his jeans and pulling his hips against mine. He hissed, squeezing his eyes shut and I smirked, my lips grazing his neck.

"It's my turn now," I mumbled against his sweet smelling skin.

He did nothing to protest, and I flipped him around so his back was now pressed against the door. I let my hands wander from his belt loops to his hips and slowly moved my hands up his sides and around to his stomach. I moved upwards, marveling at how fit he was underneath. I pushed the pea coat off his shoulders, letting it drop to the ground. I let my fingers travel back down his chest and abs and wiggled them underneath his shirt. He raised his arms quickly, and I pulled the shirt up and over his head.

My mouth made its way to his shoulder and I bit down, a delicious groan slipping from his mouth. I smiled before kissing down his chest and down his stomach. I let my tongue slip between my teeth, following the small trail of hair down his stomach and past his belly button. I stopped at the top of his pants, at this point on my knees.

I looked up at him and had to bite back a moan at the beautiful sight before me. His head was thrown back, hair falling into his eyes, which were squeezed shut. He was biting furiously on his lip, and his fists were clenched, his hips lifting slowly closer to me with his back arched.

"You are so fucking hot," I muttered, before looking down again.

I could see the obvious bulge in his pants, and it turned me on even more that _I_ was the one who had caused it. I unbuttoned his pants, taking my sweet time dragging the zipper down. He groaned softly, and I smiled before moving my fingers underneath the rim of his pants. I wanted to pull them down, but it was better to torture him. I slid my fingers on the outside towards his hips, then moved them back in to the middle, my fingertips dangerously close to his dick.

"Bri, Jesus," he breathed out, his hips moving involuntarily, "sto' bein' such a fuckin' tease."

I laughed softly to myself, finally taking my fingers out from his pants and taking the belt loops again. I slid the pants down to the ground, and he hurriedly kicked off his shoes and stepped out of the pants. I was on my knees again, my mouth inches from the place I knew he wanted me to touch the most. I breathed on the tent in his boxers, not sure what I wanted to do with him yet.

I didn't get time to decide, because next thing I knew, he was lifting me up so I was standing and flipping us around so I was once more up against the door.

"Ya go' too many clothes on," he whispered in my ear, hurriedly pulling my shirt up and over my head.

I ground my hips against his and his breath hitched before he yanked on my sweat pants. They slipped down my legs and I stepped out of them, kicking them to the side. He pressed his body against mine, his hips slowly rocking against me as his mouth caressed my neck. I let my head fall to the side and moaned his name. I pulled lightly at his dark brown locks and he ground into me especially hard.

"Go' I love i' when ya fuckin' do tha'," he mumbled against my skin, the heat of his breath sending another shot of pleasure straight between my legs.

I wrapped my legs around his waist, squeezing until I could feel his dick pressing into me. We moaned as one and all I could think about was how much more I wanted and how this contact wasn't enough.

"Bedroom," I panted, unwrapping my legs and pushing his shoulders while we furiously moved our lips together. "Now."

He didn't need telling twice, willingly letting me lead him towards the bedroom as his lips continued to move with mine. We kept bumping into shit, and I thought I heard glass break, but I didn't give a fuck at the moment.

We eventually made it through the door of my room and he took my hand, taking the lead and swinging me around. I landed on the bed, bouncing up and then back down before he slowly crawled on top of me. I pulled his body onto mine and moaned at the delicious friction our half-naked bodies created.

He lifted himself above me with his arms, moving his fingers underneath me to unhook my bra, and expertly pulling it off of me. His hands moved to play with my breasts and I arched my back, biting my lip to keep from screaming. His thumbs grazed my nipples and I whimpered, reaching up to grip his hair again. He moved down to kiss me quickly, then moved his hands from my breasts down my stomach. He reached the top of my underwear, pausing for a second to torture me before pulling them off.

I reached for my nightstand drawer, hastily digging through the dusty box of condoms inside. I pulled one out, turning back to a completely naked Murphy raised above me. He had pulled off his boxers, and I was shaking with need, hurriedly handing him the condom. He ripped it open with his teeth and put it on quickly. I spread my legs a little farther, and I watched as he lowered his body onto mine.

He moved between my legs until he was at the right angle and pushed himself inside me. I cried out, biting my lip hard to keep the noise down. He wasted no time moving, each thrust a little harder and a little faster than the last. I whimpered desperately, my hips moving to meet each thrust as he panted above me.

"Murphy, fuck," I breathed without thinking, my head tossed to the side while my eyes stayed closed.

"Go' this is so fuckin' good," he moaned, resting his sweaty forehead on my shoulder. "I fuckin' missed this…"

"Me too," I nodded, running my fingers through his now sweaty hair.

He moved even faster, and I knew neither of us would last much longer. I wrapped my legs around him, moaning as he got even deeper inside of me. He pushed in harder, and I dug my face in a pillow while I cried out in pleasure.

"Fuck," he groaned out, his eyes shut, "fuck, Bri, 'm gonna cum.."

"I know," I panted, my hips moving furiously against his, "I know me too."

"I love you," he whispered breathily, kissing me on the lips.

"I love you too," I practically whined, and he bit my shoulder hard before finally climaxing.

The combination of love and pain from his bite pushed me over the edge, and I pulled at his hair as I came, my hips moving up and down at their own accord. He collapsed on top of me and I let my fingers run up and down his back, our breathing slowing down together.

"'ave I ever tol' you 'ow good o' a kisser ya are?" Murphy asked, before kissing me on the nose.

"Yeah you have," I giggled, kissing him sweetly on the lips, "but it never gets old. You know, you're a pretty fantastic kisser yourself."

"Mm," he hummed in appreciation, kissing me once more.

His hands were wandering and I was trying not to get myself all excited again. It was almost four in the morning now and I was going to be dying at work the next day. Murphy moved to kiss my neck and I closed my eyes, wondering if maybe I should just take the day off…

"What was that?" Murphy asked suddenly, sitting up and listening for something.

"What?" I asked, sitting up too and staring at him.

"I thought I heard a door close…." he looked confused, now turning to stare at my closed bedroom door.

"We _do_ live in an apartment," I suggested gently, giggling at his paranoia. "It's probably just someone upstairs or something."

"Yeah," he nodded, turning back to look at me, "yeah you're probably right. Now….where were we?"

I laughed at the cocky grin on his face, and he raised his eyebrows suggestively. I pulled him closer to me, the two of us making out like a couple of horny teenagers. He moved his lips back to my neck to finish where he left off, and I sighed in satisfaction.

Oh yeah, I was definitely taking the day off.


	7. Chapter 7

**Author's Note:** So in this chapter, we're actually starting to get out of the depression lol. I've been so excited to write this part, and it's finally here :D! Hope you guys enjoy it!

**Chapter 7**

_Tap. Tap. Tap. _

I stirred, rolling over as I inhaled the sweet smell that could only be Bri. She had this unique smell about her that I had never been able to find anywhere else. Somewhere between fabric softener, vanilla, and baby soap. Whatever it was, I loved it; it had a certain warmth to it, a familiarity that left me feeling invincible.

I snuggled into her hair, not caring how childish I was being at the moment. No one was watching and she was sleeping, no harm done.

_Tap. Tap. Tap. _

I took my nose out of her hair, lifting up a little bit. What the hell was that?

I stayed still for a moment, waiting for it to start up again. After a few minutes, I shrugged and propped myself up on my elbow, staring at the back of Bri's head. She sniffed and rolled over, and for a moment, I thought she was going to wake up. I found I didn't want her to; I liked seeing her in this peaceful state. I sighed in relief when she continued her steady breathing, now facing me.

I moved a strand of hair out of her face, a small smile on my lips. God, I was so crazy about her. She made me feel things I never thought I could feel, and I couldn't believe I had gone this long without seeing her or even _speaking _to her. My stomach twisted with guilt, imagining how hard it must have been for her, her so called "husband" suddenly falling off the face of the earth. Every time she called me and I actually answered we fought, and eventually I just stopped answering altogether….

_Tap. Tap. Tap. _

I was snapped out of my guilt session, quickly sitting up and looking around. This whole Saints thing had me paranoid…

"Murphy?" Bri squinted against the darkness in the room. "What are you doing?"

"I, uh," I looked around awkwardly, realizing how ridiculous I was being. "I was jus' gonna go ta the bathroom."

"Oh," she mumbled sleepily, her eyes falling closed again, "It's on the right, right after Dylan's room."

I froze at the sound of my son's name, and she felt it. Her eyes opened again, and I hastily tried to act as if it hadn't affected me, standing up to grab my pants off the floor.

"You could go in and see him you know."

I closed my eyes, shakily zipping my pants up. She was right; I could go see him right now. I could walk into his room, see his sleeping form, shake him gently awake and take him into my arms. I could tell him I loved him, had always loved him, and was never going to leave him again.

I could be a good father.

"I's so early." It was a lame excuse, but it was the only one I had.

She rolled over and glanced at the clock, which was flashing a bright 4:45 am.

"Well, stay then," she rolled back over to look at me. "He gets up at six, it's only about an hour away."

I averted my eyes, looking around for my shirt. I could feel her watching me as I picked it up and pulled it over my head. It's not like I didn't _want_ to see Dylan; I wanted it more than anything in this world…

I just wasn't ready.

"I dunno Bri…" I sighed, finally turning to look at her expectant face, "I don' think this is the bes' time…"

"What?" she looked irritated, closing her eyes once more and dropping her head back on the pillow. "What do you mean it's not the best time?"

"I mea'…" I rubbed the back of my neck, looking everywhere but at her, "I jus' think may'e I shoul' wai'…"

"We'll talk about it later," she sighed, "I'm too tired right now."

I nodded even though she couldn't see me.

_Tap. Tap. Tap. _

I was reminded why I originally got up in the first place. I walked around the bed quickly, giving her a chaste kiss on the forehead.

"I love ya," I breathed, pressing my forehead against hers for a moment.

"Love you too," she laughed, almost half asleep by now, "even though you're a pain in my ass."

I laughed, kissing her on the lips before standing up straight once more.

_Tap. Tap. Tap._

I opened the bedroom door and walked through it, closing it as quietly as possible behind me. The tapping was coming from the kitchen, and I slowly made my way towards it. Something crunched under my feet and I jumped, looking down at the ground. I blushed when I saw a broken vase, flowers and water scattered across the floor with pieces of glass scattered in the mess. I stepped carefully over it, rounding the corner and into the kitchen.

Hailey was standing over the counter, chopping up vegetables and dropping them into a crockpot. I watched as she sliced the last bit of a carrot, then pushed them all with the edge of her knife off the cutting board and into the pot.

"Hi, Murphy."

I jumped when she said my name, not knowing she could see me.

"Uh, hi," I replied, scratching the back of my neck awkwardly.

_Tap. Tap. Tap._

She continued to chop the vegetables, never once turning to look at me; it was making me nervous.

"So," she began, her voice sickly sweet, "did you have a nice time last night?"

"I- uh-" I stuttered, not really sure what to say.

"I'd say so," she cut me off, her voice still unnaturally nice as she slid another fully chopped carrot into the pot. "You were here all night right? With Bri?"

She put the cutting board down, knife still in her hand and turned around to look at me. She raised her eyebrows and crossed her arms, an expectant look upon her face. I just nodded, not able to talk at the moment. I was too busy wondering how she knew all this already, and staring at the large knife still clutched in her fist.

"Look," the nice façade dropped, and I could see the protective gleam in her eyes, "this better not be some one night stand thing."

I shook my head quickly.

"Good, because you know that would tear her apart. I don't wanna hear about you refusing to talk to her again, you got that? That was bullshit, Murphy, and you know it."

I nodded, feeling shamed as I nervously bit at my thumbnail.

"You deserve to be screamed at, but everyone's asleep. Just don't mess this up, ok? You can say you'll stay all you want, but actions speak louder than words."

"Righ'," I was finally able to say something, "righ' I know."

She turned back around, grabbing a potato off the counter and beginning to chop again. I stared at the back of her head for a second, finally turning around and heading back out of the kitchen. I heard a crunch again and quickly jumped back off the glass.

"Oh yeah, and next time," Hailey called to me, and I could see a small grin on her face as she looked down at the potato, "try not to have _too_ much fun."

I felt my face grow hot and chuckled lightly, shaking my head and making my way back towards the bedroom.

**~BDS~**

Murphy entered the room, and I sat up in the bed, staring at him.

"What took you so long?" I asked, watching him plop down on the bed.

"I- uh- couldn't fin' i'," he replied, sitting down on the bed next to me.

"Uh huh," I hummed, my eyebrows furrowing suspiciously at him.

He looked away from me, and I shrugged, stretching my whole body out like a cat.

"You want some coffee?" I asked him.

"Yeah, sure," he answered, smiling at me and giving me a quick kiss, "'m jus' gonna go try ta fin' the bathroom agai'."

"Ok," I said with a laugh, watching him walk out the door.

I shook my head, then got up and headed to the kitchen. I stepped back quickly when I saw the broken vase on the floor. So _that's_ what I heard last night.

"Hey, Hailey," I said cheerily, seeing her leaning standing over the crockpot, mixing the contents inside.

"Hey," she replied, and I reached over her head to get two coffee cups out of the cabinet.

"So," she turned around to look at me, trying not to smile, "why are you getting two coffee cups, huh?"

"I'm just um…" I scratched the back of my neck, an embarrassed grin on my face, "really thirsty?"

"Sure," Hailey teased, "did you have fun last night?"

I laughed, shaking my head and pouring coffee into the two cups.

"Yes, I did, thank you very much," I replied, the grin still on my face.

"A little _too_ much fun," she motioned towards the broken vase right in front of the kitchen walkway.

"Yeah, about that-" I began awkwardly.

"I'm not cleaning it up," Hailey put her hands up in the air, then turning around to put the lid back on the crockpot.

It was quiet for a moment as I poured milk and sugar into my coffee, leaving them out for Murphy; he always had this certain way he made it that I could never get right. He entered the kitchen, grinning at me and preparing his coffee.

"You know, you guys should really be more careful," Hailey said as Murphy and I sat at the kitchen table. There was a teasing tone to her voice, and I knew she was about to go on one of her notorious rampages.

"Breaking a vase and then not cleaning it up?" she still had her back to us, the sink running as she started washing all the dishes, "That's really dangerous you know."

I was trying not to laugh when I saw Murphy's face, which looked genuinely guilty; he had no idea Hailey was just kidding.

"There's a three year old right down the hall too!" she exclaimed, getting a little more passionate as she put the cutting board away. "What if he would have heard? He would've been scarred for life!"

I just shook my head and rolled my eyes, watching her scrub the knife with a sponge. I giggled at Murphy's nervous face as he stared at the knife.

"Seriously, you guys," she turned around with the knife in her hand, pointing at each of us with it. "You should be ashamed of yourselves!"

"Why are ya _yellin'_?"

Connor entered the kitchen, scratching the back of his head tiredly, clad in pajama pants and a white shirt. I burst out laughing, and Hailey froze, turning bright red with the knife still pointed at both of us.

"Is tha' righ', Rambo?" Murphy asked with a grin, and we all three laughed.

**~BDS~**

"Yeah, can I get a pack of green Kools, please," Hailey said to the man behind the counter, her ID and five dollar bill in hand.

"Do ya ever try anythin' different?" Connor asked her curiously, watching the man behind the counter hand her the pack.

"Nah," Hailey replied, handing the man the five dollars, "I've been smoking these since I was 17."

"'ow long 'ave ya been smokin'?" Connor asked as they made their way out the door.

Hailey took a lighter out of his pocket, a cigarette already between her lips.

"Since I was 14," she replied, "I didn't even like them; I just wanted to, I thought they were cool."

"Aye, I was 13," Connor replied, "I snuck two outta ma's purse, an' me an' Murph wen' in the backyar' an' smoked 'em."

"Did you like them?" she asked, flicking her cigarette as they began to walk.

"No' really," he answered honestly. "I fel' kinda bad actually, Murphy couldn' sto' coughin' fer 10 minutes straigh'."

"He smokes more than you do," Hailey pointed out, "he obviously didn't hate them too much."

"Yeah, I know," Connor replied, digging in his pockets for his own pack, "'e's been addicted since tha' firs' time I showed 'em ta 'im."

"Weren't we all," Hailey nodded, blowing the smoke slowly out of her mouth as they walked side by side on the sidewalk.

They walked in comfortable silence for a minute, alternatively sucking and flicking their cigarettes.

"We've been datin' a lon' time," Connor pointed out, turning to smile at her.

"We really have," Hailey laughed, smiling back at him, "we could probably walk this whole way home in silence and it wouldn't be awkward at all."

"'ow long 'as i' been now?" Connor asked playfully, acting as if he couldn't remember.

"Eight years and…" Hailey trailed off, looking away from Connor with a guilty look on her face, "something….months."

"Fi'e months," Connor laughed, shoving her lightly. "Nice one. 'ho's the guy in this relationshi'?"

"Whatever, I don't care about months!" Hailey defended, shoving him back. "When you've been together as long as we have, months don't really matter. That's such a high school thing."

"I suppose yer righ'," Connor nodded, both of them stomping out their cigarettes at the same time.

They looked at each other, then laughed, Connor taking her hand in his.

"Ya know," Connor sounded nervous, looking at their intertwined fingers, "eigh' years is an awfully lon' time fer people our age ta be datin'…"

"It's not that bad," Hailey said, completely missing Connor's nervous tone.

"Well, I mea'…" Connor was trying to figure out how to word it as they walked through the door of her apartment building.

"I've heard of people dating for over ten years," Hailey went on, completely oblivious. "It's really not that uncommon anymore."

They walked to the elevators, still holding hands as Hailey leaned over to pressed the "up" button.

"Well wha' i' we took the nex' step?" Connor asked, looking at her with searching eyes. "Wha' i' we go' married?"

"No," Hailey answered immediately, "Nooo. Definitely not."

The elevator ding broke the tense silence between them, and they walked simultaneously through the opening silver doors.

"Why?" Connor finally asked, looking at her with pained eyes.

"Because," Hailey quickly looked away, not able to see him looking so upset, "I just….don't want to get married."

"Bu' why?" he asked again, as the elevator doors opened and they walked out.

"I just don't like marriage, Connor," Hailey was getting frustrated. "I don't like being tied down."

"Wha'?" Connor was taken aback, walking with her down the hallway. "So us bein' toget'er fer eigh' years is jus' some silly thin'? Ya don' thin' i's somethin' yer 'tied down' ta?"

"No, that's not what I meant-"

"Are ya sayin' ya don' plan on bein' wit' me fer much longer?" Connor asked, starting to get angry.

"No! That's not what I'm saying," Hailey answered, getting irritated as they stopped at her apartment door and she dug in her purse for her key. "I just don't like marriage, ok?"

"Yer no' givin' me any real reason why," Connor argued, watching her pull the key out of her purse.

"Why do I have to have to give you a reason?" Hailey asked, wiggling the key into the keyhole. "I just don't like marriage."

"Ok, see, tha' isn' fair, ya-"

"Connor," Hailey cut him off, giving him a stern look, her hand on the doorknob to push the door open, "this conversation is over."

"Fine," Connor sighed, then mumbled under his breath, "for now."

Hailey glared at him, but pushed the door open anyways.

Bri was standing in the living room, talking to someone Connor couldn't see behind the couch. This was the first time he was going to meet his nephew, which caused his emotions to swing from annoyed to nervous in the blink of an eye.

"Hey, guys," Bri called, smiling at both of them.

"Hey, Bri," they said together, then looked at each other and laughed.

"Dylan, someone's here to see you!" Bri said happily, holding her arms out to a boy Connor couldn't see.

She lifted him up, and Connor stifled a gasp. Dylan looked so much like Murphy. Connor smiled at him, and he gave a nervous smile back. He had Bri's eyes, but that was it. Everything else was completely Murphy; he wouldn't have been able to deny his son if he tried.

"Ca' I 'old 'im?" Connor asked, still looking at Dylan.

"Yeah, sure," Bri replied, walking towards them and handing Dylan to Connor.

Connor held the little boy in his arms, and fell in love right then and there. He hugged him close, pulling him back and just smiling at him. Dylan smiled back, looking so much like Murphy it kept throwing Connor off.

"Hi," Dylan said, giving him a toothy grin.

"Hi," Connor laughed, then looked at a smiling Hailey, "'e's so cute."

"Yeah he is," Hailey laughed, ruffling his hair, "you're a pain in the butt though too, right?"

"I'm a _big_ pain in the butt!" he exclaimed happily, looking around to see if anyone thought he was funny.

"Hailey!" Bri exclaimed, laughing at her son. "Now he's going to grow up his whole life thinking he's a pain in the butt! He's going to have no self-confidence at all."

"He'll be al'ight," Hailey waved away Bri's complaints.

"Are you my Daddy?" Dylan asked suddenly, a confused look on his face.

There was a silence as they all stared at Connor, then at Dylan, then guiltily down at their hands.

"Uh, no, buddy," Connor finally replied, looking sympathetically at Dylan's confused eyes, "bu' you'll mee' 'im soon. I promise."

**~BDS~**

"Ok, I gotta go," I whispered in Bri's ear, running a hand through her hair.

"Already?" she sighed tiredly, looking at me with sad eyes.

"Yeah," I replied guiltily, giving her a loving kiss on the lips, "I'll be back tonight."

"Ok," she said, and I could hear the bitterness in her voice, "see you tomorrow."

"I love you," I said with all the sincerity that I could.

"I love you, too," she whispered, giving me a small smile before closing her eyes.

I stared at her for a moment before grabbing my clothes and putting them back on. She knew the routine by now, we had been doing this for two weeks straight. I come over, Dylan is already asleep, I go in the bedroom with her, we talk or whatever we want to do, then I go home at five in the morning. Every night for two weeks.

I made it to Doc's and went to the back room, being quiet so I wouldn't wake Connor up. I was surprised to see the light still on, Connor sitting in a chair with his arms crossed.

"Why 're ya still up?" I asked him, closing the door behind me.

"Murph, ya can' keep doin' t'is," he ignored me, going right into lecture mode.

"Oh, go' Connor, jus' stay ou' o' it!" I plopped down on the couch, fluffing the pillow violently.

"Ya can' jus' keep runnin' away from Dylan!" Connor exclaimed angrily, jumping out of his chair with his fists clenched.

"'m no' runnin' away from 'im!" I yelled back angrily, startled by Connor's sudden rage.

"Ya are, an' 'e's so confused!" Connor yelled, walking slowly towards me.

I looked away from him, having nothing to say to that.

"I jus' saw 'im today, Murph'…" Connor lowered his voice, "'e looks jus' like ya. 'e's go' Bri's eyes, bu' the res' is all you-"

"Connor, jus' stop," I said, looking away from his pleading eyes, adjusting the blanket on the couch.

"'e asked me i' I was 'is dad," Connor went on, now leaning up against the wall.

My stomach twisted painfully, and I tried to hide it as I laid down on the couch, avoiding Connor's eyes.

"Ya nee' ta see 'im Murphy. Yer gonna-"

"Connor, jus' knock i' off, alrigh'?" I snapped angrily at him.

"Fine," Connor ended, pushing himself off the wall and opening the door leading to the bar, "bu' tha' kid needs a father an' yer i'. I's time ya star' actin' li'e i'."

He closed the door behind him and I turned on my side, the truth of his words ringing me into an uneasy sleep.


	8. Chapter 8

**Author's Note: **Oh my gosh, guys, I am SO sorry. I have been so swamped with work from school, and as the end of the year approaches the pile keeps growing. Not to mention how EXHAUSTED it makes me. I could sit here and give you excuses all day, but really, I'm sorry. I won't make you wait a month again I promise! I hope you guys enjoy this chapter though, it's the one you've been waiting for. NothingisTrue is trying to tell me that this delay is all her fault, but it's not. So yeah, just thought I'd add that

Happy Reading!

**Chapter 8**

"What do you mean he 'doesn't get it'?"

"'m tellin' ya Hailey, 'e's so fuckin' _stubborn_," Connor replied, watching her run the straightener down her hair.

"Talk to him again then!" Hailey exclaimed, annoyed with Connor.

"I can', ya don' ge' i'," he argued, "once Murph' gets somethin' in 'is brain, he jus' doesn' listen ta anyone else."

"Well, if he's going to listen to anyone, it's you," she pointed out.

"No' this time," he shook his head.

They were silent for a moment, nothing but the sounds of Hailey's straightener clapping onto her hair.

She suddenly put it down, turning to look at Connor sitting on the lid of the toilet.

"I'll talk to him then."

"Uh," Connor rubbed the back of his neck, letting out a nervous chuckle, "tha's alrigh', really Hailey. Thanks fer yer concer' bu'-"

"Why not?" she interrupted, her hands on her hips.

"Yer jus-" he looked away from her, nervously chuckling again. "Ya jus' ge' really worked up abou' stuff…"

"No, I don't," Hailey argued, her eyebrows furrowing. "I'm not gonna yell at him or anything."

"I don' think it'd be a good idea-"

"It's no big deal, Connor, really. I-"

"May'e I'll jus' talk ta 'im again-"

"Well, obviously that's not gonna work, look how the last time turned out-"

"I jus' don' think i' woul' go well-"

"Connor," Hailey cut him off again, her voice firm but convincing. "I'm _just_ going to talk to him. Promise."

Connor sighed, looking into her eyes. She seemed sincere enough, and he knew she was just looking out for Bri.

"Alrigh'," he agreed, looking away from Hailey's triumphant smile, "bu' I don' wantcha yellin', ok?"

Hailey laughed, "Don't worry, I'll be good."

"Ok," Connor nodded, smiling at her. "'m sure ya'll ge' through ta 'im. Ya 'ave tha' effec' on people."

"I've heard," she smiled back at him, love apparent in her eyes.

He stood up, leaning in and giving her a sweet kiss on the lips. As their lips parted she pressed her forehead against his, sighing as she savored the moment.

"So wha's yer plan?" he asked after pulling away.

"Well…" Hailey gave him a sheepish grin, "I need your help."

**~BDS~**

"Uh," I glanced over at Connor with raised eyebrows. "'s five o'clock, why are we-"

"I jus' need a drin' is all," Connor cut me off, avoiding my eyes as we walked side-by-side down the street.

I knew he wasn't telling the complete truth, but I didn't feel like arguing with him; he had his reasons. We walked in silence for a moment, alternating between flicking and sucking on our cigarettes. I was trying to figure out if there was anything that might have happened that would set him off…

"Ya remember when we used ta run wild back when we were lads?" Connor asked me.

"Yeah, Ma always go' so mad a' us," I laughed, shaking my head at the memory of her.

"We woul' go runnin' aroun' af'er school, an' she was a' wor'," Connor continued.

"She woul' always tell us ta go home straigh' after school," I added, "bu' we never did. We always ended u' walkin aroun' town."

"We were always beggin' people fer change we didn't even know," he laughed. "So we coul' buy some can'y bars."

"Yeah an' people gave i' ta us too!" I exclaimed happily. "I thin' they fel' sorry fer us."

"Ma woul' always sen' one of the neighbors ta go fin' us," Connor shook his head with a grin.

"An' as soo' as we go' home, she always ga'e us a beatin'," I remembered, stomping my cigarette out on the ground. "Crazy fuckin' woman, she was."

"Oh, Irelan'," Connor said fondly.

"I' was defini'ely an a'venture," I agreed, nodding my head.

Connor stomped out his cigarette, and I headed to the double doors of the bar. I glanced back, seeing Connor still pushing his foot and scuffing it on his cigarette.

"Come o', Connor!" I called over my shoulder. "I's ou'!"

I pushed open the double doors, looking around. I spotted Hailey right away in the otherwise deserted bar, having a hushed conversation with Doc. What the-? I stared incredulously as he poured two shots and placed them on the counter. I tried to catch his eye, but he only gave me a quick glance before hurrying to the back. I narrowed my eyes suspiciously; what was going on here?

"Hailey?" I questioned. "Wha' are ya doin' 'ere?"

"Come here," she said, avoiding my question. "Come have a shot with me."

There was something weird about her tone. She seemed upset, her words seeming short with just a hint of attitude laced in there. I looked over my shoulder for Connor, seeing if maybe he could tell me what was going on. He wasn't there, and I furrowed my eyebrows in confusion.

"Where's Connor?" I asked, looking back at Hailey. I knew he was up to something…

"I told him to let us talk one-on-one," she replied simply, patting the bar stool next to her. "Come on, Murph', just come have a shot."

I walked hesitantly toward her, watching her the whole time. I slipped slowly onto the bar stool, raising my eyes expectantly.

"Ready?" she asked, handing me my shot glass.

"Uh, yeah, sure," I answered, quickly taking the shot glass and tapping it on her glass.

"To family," she said, her eyes drilling into mine.

"Yeah," I mumbled, looking away from her as I took the shot.

I let the alcohol slide down my throat, now knowing what this was all about. We sat in silence for a moment, the tension growing stronger. I was expecting her to yell at me, give me a real firm "talking to" like Ma used to do. I braced myself for it, mentally preparing myself for the things she might say.

"Murphy," she began, piercing me with those green eyes of hers. "This shit's gotta stop."

I just nodded.

"You have a son, alright?" she went on. "You've got to accept it. He's your fucking son, your flesh and blood, and you've abandoned him. How the fuck could you do that, Murph'? It isn't like you. You seem to care so much about family, I mean, look at how close you are with your brother, and then your Mom, who's living so far away. Even your Dad-"

"I-" I tried to cut in.

"Nu-uh," she held her hand up, cutting me off. "I'm talking here. This is not okay. You can't sit back, hiding behind your 'I'm a bad influence' excuse your whole life. I know you've heard it a thousand times, but he looks just like you, Murphy…"

I looked away from her, guilt tugging relentlessly at the pit of my stomach.

"You're not going to be a bad influence," Hailey sighed, her voice taking on a gentler tone. "He needs a Dad, Murphy, a good father in his life. He needs another man to look up to. You keep blowing everyone off when we tell you, but I know the real reason. You're scared, I get that, I know. You're scared; I'd be fucking scared, too."

She took a drink out of a beer sitting with her on the bar. I let her words sink in, silently watching her drink.

"I mean, in all honesty, you're being a bit of a pussy," she continued bluntly, setting her beer back down. "I know you think you're going to be bad influence and all, but you need to get over it. Don't you think every parent feels like that? It's not like all other parents besides you go into raising a child with complete confidence. Don't you think you're being a bit conceited in a way?"

I was taken aback, staring at her with a mixture of confusion and guilt.

"Now," she stood up, taking my arm and forcing me into a standing position. "It's almost 6 o'clock. They're probably just now getting finished with dinner. You're gonna march your ass over there, and you're gonna meet your fucking son."

All I could do was nod, stumbling as she pulled me towards the double doors.

"Now, go," she pushed me, and I stumbled awkwardly through the doors. "Oh, and do me a favor, tell Connor he can come out now, it's all good."

"Wha'?" I spoke for the first time, looking around. "Where the fuck 's 'e?"

"Behind the wall there," Hailey laughed, pointing around the corner.

I quickly headed around, seeing Connor sitting up against the brick, smoking a cigarette. He spotted me rounding the corner and gasped, immediately beginning to cough. His eyes began to water as he tried to battle the mass of smoke in his lungs. I burst out laughing, watching him try to catch his breath.

"Murph'?" he asked, even though clearly it was me trying to stamp out his abandoned cigarette.

I just continued laughing, turning around and walking away.

I had business to take care of.

**~BDS~**

"Mommy, I want more," Dylan whined to me, reaching for the spoon sitting in the pot of macaroni and cheese on the table.

"No, Dylan," I sighed, moving the pot and spoon out of his reach. "You've had two bowls; I don't want you getting sick."

"But I love macaroni and teese," he argued, climbing out of his chair to follow me to the sink.

"Cheese," I corrected him gently, ruffling his hair as he wrapped his arms around my leg. "I know you love it, but I'm not giving you another bowl you might get-"

There was a knock on the door, cutting me off mid-sentence.

"Did you forget the key _again_, Hailey?" I laughed, putting the pot in the sink and heading to the door.

I shook my head with a smile, hurriedly unlocking the door. I threw it open and gasped, Murphy staring at me nervously, his hands shoved deep into his pockets.

"Murphy?" I asked, staring at him. Did he know that Dylan was up? That he might see him? That any second now, Dylan would be running around the corner asking-

"'ho is it, Mommy?"

**~BDS~**

Holy shit.

It was like looking in a mirror, staring at that three year old little boy. His voice so small and innocent as he looked up at me, curiosity in his eyes. My heart swelled, and I could feel my stomach erupting with butterflies. I felt like a giddy schoolgirl, my hands beginning to shake and an involuntary smile spreading across my lips.

"Hi," I said awkwardly, taking a step inside.

Bri was speechless beside me, just looking between Dylan and me. I chuckled nervously, looking away from her questioning eyes to look at Dylan's, which were the exact same shade of brown.

"Uh, Dylan," Bri stuttered, trying to think of the best way to word it. "This- this is-"

He ran up to me, wrapping his arms around my legs. I was shocked, staring at the top of his head, silent. I snapped out of it quickly, putting my hands under his arms and lifting him up. He pulled his head back, observing my face. I stared back at him, taking it all in. His nose, the shape of his eyes, his mouth, his ears, his hair color….it was all mine. Everyone was right; this kid was the spitting image of me.

"_You're_ my Daddy….right?" he asked me, after his analysis of my face was finished.

I raised my eyebrows, the smile on my face getting even bigger as I pulled him close to me.

"Aye," I whispered in his ear, hugging him as tight as I could. "Yes, I am."

**~BDS~**

"Goodnight, baby," I whispered, kissing Dylan softly on the kiss.

"Nigh', Mommy," he whispered.

"Goo'nigh', buddy," Murphy mumbled, hugging him and running his hand quickly through Dylan's hair.

"Night…" Dylan breathed, closing his eyes. "Daddy…"

I watched Murphy's face, and saw it brighten at the name. I smiled, and slipped my hand into his as we walked out of the room. I closed the door softly behind me, then turned to look at him. I opened my mouth to speak, but he cut me off, pressing his lips against mine. I melted into the kiss, wrapping my arms around his neck. He pulled away, pressing his forehead against mine.

"What made you come?" I asked him, the question that had been bouncing around in my brain all night.

"Hailey," he answered simply, chuckling softly at it. "She go' Connor in on i'. He brough' me ta the bar an' then lef' me there wit' Hailey, who ga'e me a sho' an' then le'tured me abou' how I was bein' a pussy."

I laughed out loud, pulling my forehead away from his and shaking my head.

"That sounds like her."

"I' worked though," he went on, giving me a big smile. "I'm finally here."

"Yes," I sighed, moving in for another kiss. "You're finally here."


	9. Chapter 9

Author's Note: Well….there's nothing I can say that will justify this long of a delay. All I can say is time got away from me, and I got caught up in the summer life. NothingIsTrue has been trying to get me to write this forever, and I finally got around to doing it.

Anyway, we only have two chapters left. The whole rest of the story has been mapped out, so all I have to do is write them. I can't tell you how long it'll be, but its only two chapters, so I don't think it'll be long, especially since I know everything I need to write now

I hope you guys enjoy this chapter, I really enjoyed writing it. I forgot how much I love this story :)

Chapter 9

I rolled over, groaning softly at my morning aches and pains. My eyes were still closed, as I fought with the sun on whether I should really wake up or not. The orange glow of the sun on my eyelids won, and with a sigh I opened my eyes. I reached for Murphy, and my heart skipped a beat when I saw he wasn't there.

_"Mm, good morning honey," I sighed, rolling over to take Murphy into my arms. _

_ I heard a faint crunching sound underneath my arm, and realized his side of the bed was empty. My eyebrows furrowed and I quickly sat up. There was a piece of paper, folded in half and now wrinkled from my arm. I picked it up, unfolding and instantly recognizing Murphy's handwriting. _

Bri,

You are the best thing that's ever happened to me, and I know our baby will be too. I can't see them though, not right now. I can't explain it to you right now; 'It's never been easy with to express my feelings for you, especially to you; but, I think you know that. I just need to go away for a little bit. It won't be forever, but I can't tell you how long I'll be gone. Please, don't hate me, and know that I will ALWAYS love you…please understand that I have to do this.

Love, Murphy

_ I stared at the paper even after I had finished reading it. My heart was pounding, and my hands were shaking, but I couldn't move. I could feel my eyes filling with tears, and let them fall down my cheeks. I rubbed my pregnant belly and, as if on queue, I could feel my baby kick inside of me._

_ I heard the front door open and I sat up straighter, listening for who it could be. I heard the sound of wheels and, somehow, I knew it was a suitcase. I jumped off the bed as fast as I could and ran to the door. There was Murphy, struggling to pull a suitcase out the front door._

_ "Murphy!" I exclaimed, more tears cascading down my face. "What are you doing? Please, don't go!"_

_ He stared at me for a moment, a deer caught in headlights. His face looked pained as he watched me sob, rubbing my tears fiercely away from my eyes so I could stare right back at him. After a moment he shook his head, finally getting the suitcase out the door. I watched in disbelief as he put his hand on the doorknob, ready to pull it shut. _

_ "Murphy," I begged softly. "Please, _please,_ don't do this…"_

_ "'m sorry," he whispered, unable to look at me as he softly closed the door. That soft click as the door shut, that weak regret as he turned away from me...it hurt more than if he had slammed it right in my face._

I shook the memory from my mind, already tearing up. He couldn't have left, not again…

I jumped out of bed, bolting out the door, my heart racing. One more turn and I'd be at the front door.

"Where ya goin' in such a hurry?"

I stopped dead in my tracks, turning to the sound of Murphy's voice. He was standing in the kitchen, flipping something on the stove. He was looking at me with an amused expression on his face, and I laughed guiltily.

"I just… never mind," I shook my head slightly, pushing my insecurities to the side. I decided not to bother him with my constant paranoia; I knew how he got when I brought up him leaving. It was like her was in physical pain, and who was I to inflict that sort of torture on him? "What are you making?"

"Well, I was gonna ma'e ya brea'fas' in bed, but seein' as ya were so eager ta go this mornin'…"

"I'm sorry," I laughed, still recovering from my freak-out. I walked to the table and sat down, inhaling for the first time the sweet smell of bacon and eggs. How had I not smelled that before?

"So, 'ow'd ya sleep?" he asked, putting his back to the stove and facing me.

I let my eyes wander, noticing how nice his white t-shirt hung on his shoulders, or how his pajama pants sat on his hips just right.

"Bri?" he questioned, smirking and raising his eyebrows.

"Sorry," I blushed, laughing and shaking my head. "I slept fine. You?"

"The bes' I've slep' in a lon' time," he replied with a smile.

We gazed into each other's eyes, a slight smile on both of our lips. I was swimming in those light blue eyes, feeling safe for the first time in what felt like forever. Our eyes stayed locked in a loving stare until we noticed the smell of something burning coming from the stove.

"Shit!" he exclaimed, swinging around to hurriedly take the bacon off. I laughed, then turned to something moving out of the corner of my eye.

"Hi, buddy!" I exclaimed, watching Dylan rub his eyes tiredly.

He was clad in his favorite dinosaur footie pajamas, his little fist rubbing profusely at his sleepy eyes. I smiled lovingly at him, holding my arms out to him.

"What are you _making_?" he asked, Murphy, looking curiously at the stove.

"Bacon an' eggs," he said with a smile, getting three plates out of the cabinet. "Tha' soun' good?"

Dylan nodded with a smile, and then turned to me. I motioned for him to come here and he ran into my arms, cuddling into my stomach.

"Aww," I cooed, pulling him onto my lap. "How's my baby boy today?"

"Good," he said, leaning back on me.

"So I 'ave ta mee' Connor, Romeo, Romeo's uncle, an' Da at the Silver Peso af'er dis," Murphy told me, setting down three plates with breakfast on them.

"Will you be back?" Dylan asked, looking very concerned as he watched Murphy sit down at the table.

"O' course I'll be ba'," Murphy answered with a laugh, ruffling Dylan's hair affectionately.

I smiled at the two of them, reaching down to eat my breakfast, completely content. I knew this time Murphy would be coming back.

**~BDS~**

"Connor, I'm not having this discussion _again_," Hailey exclaimed angrily, slamming the car door.

"Again? We've barely discussed i' a' all! Ya won' gi'e me an answer!" he yelled right back, following her through the door of McGinty's.

"H-h-hi guys," Doc said happily, looking at the two of them.

He quickly noticed the tension between them and his smile faded.

"I'll just let you – fuck! ass! – work this out on your own," he said before leaving for the back. The bar was deserted now except for the two of them.

"What kind of answer do you want from me, huh, Connor? Do you want me to just give in and give you what you want? That's not going to happen!"

"I wanna know tha' ya thin' t'is i' goin' ta las'!" Connor said desperately, staring at Hailey.

"I'm not saying it's not going to last! I never did, and you're putting words into my mouth. I just don't like marriage, I don't like commitment, and I don't want to get married."

"Well, tha's fuckin' stupi'," Connor snapped.

"I don't care if you think it's 'fucking stupid'; that's how I feel," Hailey replied curtly.

There was a tense silence between them, neither looking at the other.

"Look, Connor, this is silly. I don't understand why you can't-"

"Yeah i's always abou' why _I_ can' do t'is an' why _I_ can' do tha'. I's always my fuckin' faul' ain' i'?"

"I didn' say tha'-" Hailey tried to say.

"Well, tha's wha' yer implyin'." Connor cut her off.

Silence again enveloped the room, and Hailey began to tear up. Connor refused to acknowledge it, crossing his arms and staring at the dirty tiled floor while he leaned against a nearby wall.

"Connor, you know I love you and I care about you-"

"Tha' jus' isn' enough though, is i'?" He asked snidely.

"I never said that, you need to understand-"

"Ya know wha'? I gi'e up."

Connor stepped away from the wall, uncrossing his arms and looking at Hailey for the first time. She had tears in her eyes but they hadn't fallen yet. She was watching him, not really sure what to say.

"All I e'er wanted was ta ge' married and star' a family. I though' I was shi' outta luck til I me' you. I fell in love wit' ya as soon as I saw ya and I've fallen 'arder and 'arder as da years go by. I though' fer sure tha' ya were da one- tha' ya were da one I would spend the res' o' me life wit'."

Hailey stared at him, shocked at such a heartfelt confession- Connor was never like this.

"An' 'ere I am, beggin' ya ta marry me an' you refuse. So now 'm holdin' on ta somethin' tha's obviously no' gonna las'-"

"No," Hailey jumped in, finally finding her voice. "Come on, I didn't say that-"

"So o'viously, I nee' ta jus' gi'e up," Connor cut her off again, not even listening to anything she had to say. "'m gonna go, try ta figur' some t'ings ou'."

"Connor, come on don't leave, please…" Hailey begged, her voice catching a little.

"No Hailey," Connor finally looked at her, "i's too fuckin' la'e fer ya to suddenly wan' me aroun'."

"I didn't say I don't want you around-!"

"Ya didn' 'ave to say i'."

"We can fix this Connor," Hailey said desperately, watching Connor walk towards the door.

He pushed it open before turning back to look at her sadly.

"A' much a' I wan' tha' ta be true," Connor said softly. "I dunno i' we can."

With that he walked out, slamming the door behind him. Hailey stared in disbelief at the door, then collapsed in a chair, finally letting out the tears she had been holding back.

**~BDS~**

I tapped my fingers impatiently on the counter, taking nervous sips of my water. Where was Connor? It wasn't like him to be late like this.

"Sir, would you like a refill?"

I looked up, startled by this waiter that had seemed to appear out of thin air. I looked down at my glass, which I had emptied without realizing it.

"Tha'd be grea', t'anks," I replied with a small smile.

He nodded at me and went to get a pitcher. I watched him walk away, and saw Connor walk through the front door.

"Connor!" I waved my hand at him, and noticed right away that he looked upset.

He walked to our table in the back, sitting down without a word. I watched him for a moment, waiting for him to say something. Finally, after a tense couple of minutes, I spoke up.

"Why're ya so upse'?"

"'m no'," was his immediate response, refusing to look at me.

"Righ'," I said sarcastically, rolling my eyes. "Tell me wha's up, or yer no' gonna be able ta focus when we all tal'."

"Hailey an' I are havin' problems, alrigh'?" he snapped.

"Why?"

"She still doesn' wanna ge' married, an' I blew up a' 'er, practically breakin' up wit' 'er before walkin' ou'."

"Wow…"

I just watched him, seeing the worry lines on his forehead. I rubbed his back, knowing there was nothing I could really say that would make things better. I looked over my shoulder, seeing Romeo, his Uncle and Da all walking in.

"'ey, chin up fer now, alrigh'?" I said quickly, giving him a few pats on the back. "Ya nee' ta focus. Hailey's no' goin' anywhere, I promise."

He gave a small nod before sitting up a little straighter, greeting the three men with a smile. The waiter came back with a pitcher and four more glasses, filling them all and then letting us be. After a few hellos, Romeo's uncle Cesar began talking.

"Word is, Yakavetta was gunning for you boys hard. And he wasn't the only one. The whole city's on edge. A lot of people want you dead and I'm guessing this "Crew Cut" guy is one of them. I even heard there's a reward posted like Jesse James style and shit. Any guy that takes you out gets his palm crossed, two hundred and fifty grand."

"Whew. A quarter of a mill for us?" Romeo joked, laughing at himself.

"Us? What the fuck are you talking about 'us'?" Cesar looked shocked, turning to scowl at Romeo.

They began to fight in Spanish, his Uncle obviously not knowing that Connor and I are fluent in several different languages, one of which being Spanish.

"Tío, ¿por qué tienes que me falta de respeto frente a ellos? (Uncle, why do you have to disrespect me in front of them?)" Romeo asked angrily.

"Tranquilo, Mr. Big Shot! Hace un año usted estaba lavando ollas y sartenes! (Cool it, Mr. Big Shot! A year ago you were washing my pots and pans!)" His Uncle spat back.

"Bueno, yo no se lavan las ollaas de follando ya! Yo soy parte de esto, el tío! (Well, I don't wash fucking pots anymore! I'm part of this, Uncle!)"

"Hey! Esta no es mi bar-b-que primer! Ahora, tu dejar de interrumpir! Déjame hablar con ellos y voy a averiguar si tu está en este o en su propio mundo de fantasía de follando! (Hey! This isn't my first bar-b-que! Now, stop interrupting! Let me talk to them and I'll figure out whether you're in on this or in your own fucking fantasy world!)" Cesar was starting to really get angry now, but that protective gleam in his eye told me it was purely out of love. He was just trying to protect his family.

Romeo clenched his fists, his face turning bright red. I figured it was time for me to intervene.

"Él está con nosotros. (He's with us.)" I interrupted, Cesar turning to look at me in surprise.

"Is my nephew pulling his weight?" he asked, looking at both Connor and me.

"Mucho corazón. (A lot of heart)." Connor said, nodding and tapping his chest.

Cesar turned to Romeo, a newfound respect in his eyes. He touched Romeo's hand, giving him a small smile. Romeo stared at his uncle, and I realized they were having a special moment right now. I felt slightly uncomfortable, shifting my feet and looking at my hands on the table.

"I have to go," Cesar said softly, standing up. He gave Romeo's hand one last pat before leaving without another word.

There was a silence, and I heard Romeo begin to sniffle. I kept my eyes on my hands, growing even more uncomfortable as the silence stretched on.

"I'm gonna-uh- use da res'room. I'll be righ' bac'," Da said, surprising me. He was so quiet; I had forgotten he was there.

I watched him leave, jealous he had thought of an excuse before me.

Romeo continued to sniffle, and I couldn't handle the awkward tension any longer.

"'ey, uh, is anybo'y hungry? May'e we shoul', ya know, ge' some food or somethin'-"

"Shut up!" Connor interrupted sharply, looking serious. "Romeo's crying!"

There was a moment of silence before all three of us burst out in laughter.

"You fucking assholes!" Romeo exclaimed, though he was laughing too as he wiped the tears from his face.

"Alrigh' boys, qui' yer messin' aroun'," Da said playfully, surprising all of us as he sat back down at the table.

He smiled at us as we calmed down, the mood shifting rapidly from playful to serious. We all know how important this meeting is. Romeo excused himself, mumbling something about going to find his Uncle. I think he just realized this was a family moment.

"I know why Crew Cu' is af'er ya," Da said importantly, looking between the two of us. "He's af'er me."

Connor and I exchanged confused looks before turning back to Da.

"I don' t'ink so, Da," Connor said, his eyebrows furrowed. "'e was aimin' a' us when 'e was a' da bar."

"'t'was jus' ta draw me ou'," Da explained. "'e knew I'd come runnin' a' soo' a' 'e tried goin' af'er you two."

"Why is 'e af'er ya in da firs' place?" I asked, still puzzled.

"There's things ya still don' know abou' me," Da began. "I 'ave a dark pas', sons. Don' ya wonder why I was sen' ta prison so many years ago?"

We both nodded as we leaned a little closer, enthralled by what he was saying.

"I' all star'ed wit' my own Da…."

_TO BE CONTINUED…_


End file.
